A letter to Mrs. Maryam Uwais

FIRST THINGS FIRST: Salam Sister Maryam. I’m sure by now all those who wanted to congratulate you on your appointment have since done so; many may have sent a follow-up congratulation now that the Budget has been signed. It is now my turn, Sister, to remind you the enormous task ahead of you as the […]

FIRST THINGS FIRST: Salam Sister Maryam. I’m sure by now all those who wanted to congratulate you on your appointment have since done so; many may have sent a follow-up congratulation now that the Budget has been signed. It is now my turn, Sister, to remind you the enormous task ahead of you as the President’s Special Adviser for Social Protection Plan (SA-SPP), although I’m confident you know much more than I do. Considering how busy you may at present be, let me introduce each piece of advice with an appropriate heading:
YOUR PRINCIPAL’S TRUSTING: The President, it is said, is a very trusting fellow. It is said when, and if, he trusts someone, he trusts them forever. So it is my hope your performance on this onerous task will earn you his eternal trust, as well as the trust of all Nigerians. On this particular matter, we wish you Allah’s Guidance.
REMEMBER THREE “BA”S: It is said the late Sardauna once told his aides, who were burning the midnight candle, that “Aikin Gwamnati Ba A Gamawa, Ba A Iyawa, Kuma Ba A Yabawa!” Or “Government work never finishes, perfection can never be achieved, and nobody will praise you for getting it right!” So Sister Maryam, do as much as you can and rely on Allah’s help on the rest.
YOUR EXPERIENCE COUNTS: We had opportunity, though not close, to work together on some committees of the National Council on Privatisation as consultants to the Bureau of Public Enterprises under Mallam Nasir el Rufa’i, now Kaduna State Governor. From what I gleaned, you can deliver in sha Allah. And the fact that you founded the Isa Wali Empowerment Initiative, an NGO which targets the conditions of women and children in education, healthcare and empowerment, and with which I had professional association as Director General of Kano’s Directorate of Societal Reorientation, or A Daidaita Sahu, is an indicator that you know the subject matter.
POWER POINT PRESENTERS: By now, I’m sure those “ajebos” with pressed ties and short skirts and long presentations have come to you to suggest, in their borrowed, foreign-acquired accents, how to do your job better, and digitally. I hope you have told them all off – that you also are a pressed skirt, albeit much longer and more conservative; and that you are also well-spoken and a powerful presenter too, even though you took your law degrees at Ahmadu Bello University in Zaria.
SOCIAL MEDIA WARRIORS: As soon as you start your programme, be ready for the social media war. Among those ajebos whose well-laminated proposals you may have rejected will be some who can edit the Panama Papers and insert your name therein. They will call you names – wallahi be ready for it. They will say you are biased, that you favour one side over the other. That’s what they know best: intimidation. Take the nation along. Do not let them derail you. Be focused.
CYNICAL SKEPTICAL UNGRATEFUL: Sadly, the above three negative characteristics are the lot of millions of Nigerians – including people in whom you will be surprised. If they are not the ones entrusted on something, they will ensure the one so entrusted fails. The PhD Syndrome (Pull Him Down as they say in Yorubaland) is now a national calamity. That’s why many otherwise good people shun government appointments; so beware of PhDs.
THE ENEMY WITHIN: Half a Trillion Naira is no small money. Most of the petitions and other accusations usually emanate from the inside. Know whom you can trust among your lieutenants. Some around you will be there, but will be spying and working for and reporting to their sponsors – especially those you may engage because of someone’s influence. So try as much as possible to surround yourself with people who are seen generally above board. Mix energy (the young) with experience (the not-so-young).
AVOID NASS MEMBERS: Avoid National Assembly members like the plague. I repeat, avoid NASS members. Be courteous to them, but tell them you are working for Buhari. They will come to you on “oversight functions” and will do everything to derail you. Let them oversight and go; as for your part in their ‘Constituency Project’, let them submit suggestions, not orders.
…STATE GOVERNORS TOO: As for the State Governors, run away from them as you would a hungry hyena. They – or most of them – are the opposite of your Principal. They are salivating would they lay their hands on part of your remit! Some of them would suggest to you they know poverty in their domains more than you can ever know, so give them something. Tell them a powerful NO THANK YOU!
FANTASTICALLY REMUNERATE STAFF: May Allah rest the soul of our teacher Professor Isa Alkali Abba, BUK historian once engaged by the Buhari’s PTF. When Professor Abba came visiting BUK, he was reported to have said, “Kai! Buhari knows human dignity! He quadrupled my salary and you can’t imagine the size of my office!” (We still share offices in the university). Staff and consultants at the PTF were said to be so fantastically remunerated they had no need to ask for ten percent from contractors. So pay your people well, but if any of them does something untoward, send them to the cemetery (to paraphrase Malcolm X).
POVERTY’S CATCHMENT AREA: Coming from Kano, you know more than any other that we – the North – are the catchment area of poverty. We have the Almajirai in millions, and the Girl-Child hawker. Anyone in these parts who wants your poverty alleviation intervention MUST return to their LGA of origin and enroll their children in formal schools. Kawai!
GENERAL GOWON’S COMMITTEE: The Jonathan Administration once empanelled a committee under former Head of State General Gowon to make suggestions on social protection. We never heard of it again. Perhaps the report is on the shelf in the Villa somewhere. Also hidden somewhere in late General Abacha’s Vision 20-20 Blueprint is, if I remember correctly, a section on social protection. There’s no dearth of plans – good if you can find them and extract something useful.
BRAZIL’S BOLSA FAMILIA: On international best practices, I’m under no illusion that you are very familiar with Bolsa Familia, Brazil’s social protection initiative which, according to even the cynical World Bank and IMF, has gone a long way in ameliorating poverty in that country. It would do well for you to personally immerse yourself in their methods – forget about their local politics of impeachment.
SOUP KITCHENS IMPERATIVE: Our mutual friend, Governor el Rufa’i, used to always look at the world through decidedly capitalist eyes. All of a sudden, look at Nasir now, socialistically opening Soup Kitchens, feeding primary pupils. Yes, some people are just not lazy – it is that they lack the opportunity to even eat their way out of poverty. Soup kitchens are imperative. Wallahi people are hungry.
EQUITABLE NOT EQUAL: Even though poverty pervades the nation, we here in the North are first cousins of it. Most of it, it must be admitted, by our own hands. So be equitable, not equal, in this mass redistribution of solution. Remember the analogy of PTF roads – the cost of every one hundred kilometres of roads in the North can only pay for twenty in the South because of environmental factors. And then the North is over 70% of the nation’s landmass. Yet they ended up saying: “He built more roads in the North!” They will say so. Let them say.
ONE LAST THING: Sister, don’t plan for eight years, plan for three. And, as late Mother Theresa would say, just do what you have to do, because it’s not about you anyway. And hold on tight to HasbunalLahu wa ni’imal Wakil! You need it!