Abdulkadir and Maryam: A love story with a sad ending

The only phenomenon that remains permanent in human life is death. Each and every surviving soul shall reach his or her time. It is death that separates parents from children, wife from husband, lovers from their loved ones and human life from human world. Most moments it comes without notice. Death cares for not the […]

The only phenomenon that remains permanent in human life is death. Each and every surviving soul shall reach his or her time. It is death that separates parents from children, wife from husband, lovers from their loved ones and human life from human world. Most moments it comes without notice. Death cares for not the level, significant and consequentiality of the relating persons.

In putting down this tribute to late Abdulkadir Gwandu and my condolence to his wife Maryam L. Kaita, I begin with prayers. May Almighty Allah give you the strength to bear his loss, Maryam. May He grant him eternal rest. Whenever I look at you there is nothing to say or do to take away your pain, Maryam. We have lost both parents and now, your husband, your soul mate, your one and only true love and your best friend is gone.

The best I can say or do to console my kid sister is to ask Allah, in prayers to reward your patience, love kindness and care. You are a rare gem, an epitome of wifehood, a kind-hearted woman and a symbol of how Muslim wives should be. For a fact, you have shown Abdulkadir love and affection. You have indeed shown him more. You were there for him in sickness and in health without ever complaining.

You were the best of friends. You flocked together all the time. You share more than partnership. You were like twins. In sickness, you cared for him more than an ordinary woman will care for her husband. The best of care came when you donated 64 per cent of your liver to him.

You both will forever be part of each other physically or spiritually. He died with a part of you, your liver. What a sacrifice. If the tables were turned, by Allah, I know Abdulkadir will donate 90 per cent of his liver to you. I am so confident that even if he was asked to choose who was to live between you two, he will choose your life over his. You both shared unconditional love with passion for each other, but he loved you more.

He severally confessed that he fought diabetes, high blood pressure, and liver damage for you. He will say if not for Maryam, I will ask Allah to take my life. He was suffering and every one could see it. He will, however, say what will happen to her if am gone.

When his ailment started, a lot of people, even myself though he wasn’t gonna make it. But by the will and grace of Allah, he survived few more years. He was going in and out of coma. Allahu Akbar, he told everyone that he is only fighting to stay alive because of you Maryam. Maryam is the only reason I want to live, he would say. Maryam, my sister, I know how much you love him. But surely Allah loves him the most.

You did everything within your power to get his health back. On the 4th April 2017 on your 25th birthday you both underwent 14 hours living donor liver transplant surgery. On May 9th 2017 you both celebrated your 2nd year anniversary at the hospital recovering from the liver transplant. By Allah’s will he survived two more years with your liver.

You pray together, he works at home, you eat together, you are always together, he cooks for you, he sometimes clean the house, because he wants you to rest. He specially hand-made diabetic sandwiches and food whenever your father is in Kaduna and delivered it himself.

He helped and encouraged you established your fashion and design business. He knew your dream and encouraged it. He surprised you with four electric tailoring machines, and a generator. He made your dreams of MLK COUTURE becomes reality.

Abdulkadir has never forgotten your birthday or your wedding anniversary. He showered you with love and gifts, he celebrates your birthday and anniversary even when he was sick. He goes out of his way just to make you happy. On May 9th you both celebrated your 2nd anniversary together while you both were recovering from the liver transplant surgery in India.

When our father died on January 2nd 2018, he took care of us and stood by us like a son our mother never had.

Surely every soul will taste death.

On February 12th 2019 in Cairo Dar al Fouad Hospital, Abdulkadir passed away. And I quote doctors words. No need to cry for him he died while praying as he died “peacefully.” Allahukbar! On his death bed he prayed loudly for you, Maryam and showered prayer and blessings on you. Maryam like mother, like daughter

To be a good wife is good. But to be the wife your husband will hand over to Allah on his death bed and as the last thing on his lips is beyond comprehension.

His family kept thanking you for donating your liver and standing by him until the last moment. We also thank them because I know he would do the same or far more for you in his condition.

May Allah grant him eternal rest.

May Allah repay you for all you did to him. Yah Allah bring joy, happiness and laughter and give Maryam the strength and the fortitude to bear the loss and to move on. Maryam, May Allah reunite you and Abdulqadir in jannatul-firdaus. Amen, Amen.

Abdulkadir, you are truly missed

You will forever be in our prayers

Your memory will live on

Allah ya gafarta maka Abdulkadir Ibrahim Gwandu