Addressing menace of bullying in schools

Bullying, a situation where stronger children prey on the weakness and vulnerability of others, has sadly become a worrisome issue among children in our country, especially those in secondary schools.    It is a common phenomenon in Nigerian schools, especially among boarding schools’ students.  Though unacceptable, it is becoming the norm, rather than an aberration […]

Bullying, a situation where stronger children prey on the weakness and vulnerability of others, has sadly become a worrisome issue among children in our country, especially those in secondary schools.   

It is a common phenomenon in Nigerian schools, especially among boarding schools’ students.  Though unacceptable, it is becoming the norm, rather than an aberration and has become very dangerous and bizarre.

Bullying manifests in many forms, which include harassment, hounding, maltreatment, intimidation, oppression and discrimination among others. It is normally inflicted by the senior students on the juniors. In fact it is seen as a rite of passage in some schools. It is shocking to discover that children that are presumed innocent could perpetrate such evil against fellow youngsters.

Naturally, compassion, sympathy, empathy, care, kindness, love and forgiveness are usually associated with children.

The death of 12-year-old Sylvester Oromomi, a student of  Dowen College, Lekki, as a result of injury sustained in school via physical assault by a group of bullies has, no doubt, taken bullying to a disturbing dimension in our country.  

How could such have gone unnoticed in a school setting, which is meant to be a safe haven for children? What form of upbringing and training were these children actually exposed to?

In order to reverse the ugly trend, teachers, parents, guardians and caregivers need to be on the lookout for signs of bullying and address them promptly.

In most cases, the victims of bullying don’t want to speak out or report for fear of the aggressor.  However, there are signals or signs that could readily show that a child is being bullied.

These include constant loss of personal belongings such as shoes, beverages or socks, which is usually taken by the aggressor. Often, the victim is denied these personal things by the bully, while the parents usually assume that the child was careless.

Also, teachers, caregivers and school owners must be able to account for the whereabouts of every student during school hours and thereafter. A situation where a junior student is serving punishment or locked up somewhere, while classes are on or when siesta is being observed should not be condoned.

It has been observed that most boarding schools in the country don’t separate junior hostels from seniors’ and most of the bullying takes place in the hostel where the senior is more or less the lord. It is, therefore, necessary to separate the hostels and ensure that any senior found within the residences of the junior is dealt with.

Specifically, schools must educate students on the ills of bullying and outlaw it. The school system, culture and value should be such that they do not condone or encourage bullying in any way. School prefects should be taught to correct, not to punish; correction doesn’t have to be always punitive.

It has been estimated that children that bully are mostly from troubled backgrounds, broken homes and might have suffered varied forms of abuse or low self-esteem at one time or the other. 

Essentially, the family is, perhaps, the most powerful unit of socialization and change in the society. Hence, parents and guardians have a crucial role of imparting morals and ethics in their children/wards.

As parents, you don’t teach a child to love without showing love to that child. In the same vein, you don’t teach a child kindness without treating people around you with kindness. The way you treat your house helps or domestic workers speaks volumes and these children learn by example.

Society must be seen to promote and encourage principles that engender truth, fairness and equality; children must not only be seen, they must be heard and protected.

We must all come to realize and accept that when society permits or allows the prey of the innocence and vulnerability of the weak, then it digs its own grave. The society must, therefore, stand up and say no to bullying in every ramification.

Temilade Aruya is of Ministry of Information and Strategy, Alausa, Ikeja