Addressing the rising cases of divorce

Single parenthood is currently on the increase and has proven the capability of a disaster if not urgently checked would as a matter of time unleash untold disaster to humanity. Several factors are contributing to this menace. The rising cases of separation and divorce witnessed in marriages are a major factor. The trend has changed […]

Single parenthood is currently on the increase and has proven the capability of a disaster if not urgently checked would as a matter of time unleash untold disaster to humanity. Several factors are contributing to this menace. The rising cases of separation and divorce witnessed in marriages are a major factor.

The trend has changed from increase in the divorce of those married for more than twenty years in the 1970s to the dissolution of marriages even a few months after contracting them. In fact, before now, it was assumed that if a couple made it through two decades, the marriage was sealed for life.

Other factors are children born outside wedlock. Most times, children who are sired after wedlock are abandoned by men responsible for the pregnancy. This leaves the single mother out in the cold. The experience becomes horrible to the single mother who is abandoned to fend for the welfare of the child including education, medicare and feeding, among others.

Besides conceptions outside wedlock, breakups in marriages constitute the greater percentage in single parenthood. Unfortunately, today, the ultimate aim of the Almighty God in instituting marriage seems defeated as marriages are crashing by the seconds across the globe. God had instituted marriage for the purposes of perpetuity and procreation. But the reverse is the case.

Analysts and different schools of thoughts have attributed the alarming increase in marriage breakups to several factors. It is argued that the hyper improvement in technology has foisted several adjustments on the lives of couples. Couples who were initially compatible in several ways have now drifted apart. These include the introduction of mobile gadgets which has ridiculously facilitated promiscuity among couples as a result of easy access to vital information.

Besides, harsh economic situations have hit most families below the belt stretching the patience of most vulnerable wives to unprecedented limits. Nowadays, the vow; “for better, for worse”, is now a story for the birds. When these wives could no longer bear the excruciating pains of the stings from the harsh economic conditions, they sought for greener pastures.

In this vein, men are not spared as the harsh economic situations have turned them to gold diggers. In their gold digging adventures, they may dig deep into the gold mines of some easy virtue women and become trapped forever.

Most times, childlessness which exerts much pressure from the relatives of the couples may lead to marriage breakup if the couple fails to demonstrate intense maturity and absorb the pressure.

Another major contributor to the unprecedented marriage breakups are the legal institutions. The sanctity of marriage institutions is by no means respected by our legal institutions as they blink no eyelids in invoking some legal instruments to dissolve marriages even on the most ridiculous grounds.

Part of the efforts that would ameliorate this worrisome situation is for intending couples not to go into marriage on face values or basing marriage consideration on elements that are transient or superficial such as wealth, beauty or family background. Marriage considerations should be strongly based on genuine love which surpasses all superficial considerations.

Also, parents should reduce their influence in marriages either at the contractual stage or the marriage proper. They should allow couples to bear their crosses, including childlessness.

It is noteworthy here to submit that the parties that suffer most in marriage breakups are the children as they are raised in a very poor form, most times by single parents. This also has a spiral effect on the larger society as ill- mannered youths or adults are unleashed on the larger society. It is also not out of place to assert that women from broken homes most times do not make good wives.

At this juncture, a pathetic appeal goes to couples to strive beyond reasonable limits to make their marriages work by being prayerful and reducing to its barest minimum third party involvements in their marriages.

Okechukwu Keshi Ukegbu writes in via [email protected]