AND NOW, OVER TO YOU (X)
As if in answer to him, the immediate past President of our Association of Nigerian Authors (ANA) and former member of one of our Ruling Houses (House of Representatives) Dr. Wale Okediran wrote in to say, “I thoroughly enjoyed your piece on Dubai. I laughed heartily with your assertion that ‘God help the husband whose […]
As if in answer to him, the immediate past President of our Association of Nigerian Authors (ANA) and former member of one of our Ruling Houses (House of Representatives) Dr. Wale Okediran wrote in to say, “I thoroughly enjoyed your piece on Dubai. I laughed heartily with your assertion that ‘God help the husband whose wife discovers Dubai…except if the man is a former Senator, Member of NASS or top government official.’ I just came back from Dubai where I spent the Sallah break with my wife and had a dose of what it takes ‘when your wife discovers Dubai.’ Even though I am a former Member of the Federal House of Representatives in Abuja, my Dubai trip left a big hole in my pocket just as you predicted. The beauty of it all is that my wife also found your piece very amusing and suggested we form an association of ‘Bankrupt Husbands of Dubai-Loving Wives’! Of course, you will be the Chairman.” (And, I hastily add, my Professor friend, whose wife just returned, be made Secretary General).
But another wife is not amused. Her husband, a Barrister, wrote, “My wife, your colleague academician, has just been promoted Professor. But I took your counsel to heart and told her we shall not celebrate her promotion in Dubai. All said and done, I assure you you have got yourself a new enemy. And I hope she will not be on the panel when you apply to become Professor yourself one day.”
My Goodluck!
And talking about Goodluck, Umar Shuaibu from FUT Minna wrote, ”True, the former President wished himself a third term before wishing us Goodluck with a capital letter G. Whatever he wishes us shall certainly go the same way as others had done in the past. He plotted, but his Creator also plotted. If he does not know, he should, that the Creator is the Best of Plotters.”
On ‘A Letter from Medina’, Aminu Usman wrote: “As long as we continue to create more conditions that warrant begging, so long shall we continue to accept it as spiritual or traditional duty, at best a commercial venture. The more you give the beggars, the more you encourage them till they become richer than you. Imagine a begging leper cursing a Peugeot car at the mechanics. I asked him if a Peugeot had ever knocked him down. ‘No’, he replied ‘my own Peugeot that I put on the road as a taxi has been giving me problems.’ And he still begs. Or the little girl who shouted to her blind/beggar mother: ‘Mama, that is your taxi driving by!’ ‘Which one?’, the blind woman asked. She has more than one, but still begs! Those who flood the Haramain come back home and start raising estates, transport companies, etc, further encouraging others. What do we do? A bilateral agreement with the Saudi authorities, or legislating at home to curtail the menace? We must know what role knowledge plays in shaping people’s lives. This we have neglected.”
On ‘A Letter from Mecca’, Idris Feta posits: “You talked about something I witnessed myself, because I was staying next to that honourable tent at the VIP Camp at Muna, closed to Jamarat. Mallam Bala, to be frank with you there is nothing like GOOD PEOPLE, GREAT NATION. What I witnessed that day at Muna made me conclude there is nothing good about us. You see, even before that dishonourable show-of-shame, my first disappointment was the way Nigerians rushed for food the moment caterers started arranging dining tables. Similarly, at Clinic One in Muna, the members of staff always enjoyed watching us and laughing as we struggled and fought for everything. Second surprise for me was the way Nigerians packed drinks into their tents for personal consumption, one person taking 5-6 bottles of coke, apples, cornflakes, milk and so on. An example of this was how a certain Nigerian lady came to take a packet honey, one of which was enough as spread for breakfast. But she took five. We were shocked. So in jest, my friend and I asked her, why only five? Believe me Mallam, the lady smiled, went back to her tent, came back with a very long hijab and took the whole carton. Finally, I met a South African at Arafat and when he asked for my country and I told him Nigeria, he looked very shocked. When I asked him why, he said there are no good people in Nigeria.”
Still on Mecca, Adewale Murtala Kunle wrote: “Nice to read your piece from the Holy Land. Takes courage to be able to relate such ugly experiences. But I did not expect any less from you than the blunt truth. It only goes further to show to what length our people would go to destroy our country’s image. But logically, since many of these people have sponsors, it is our hope that the National Hajj Commission would turn its attention to this matter urgently. And Mallam, please pray for me as I want to visit the Holy Land next year.”
In his own submission, titled Annual Appraisal, Idris Abubakar, a Technologist at the Physics Department of the Kebbi State University of Science and Technology, Aliero posited: “A BIG THANK YOU to a jolly good year with lots of knowledge acquired from your write ups starting from ’Make Someone Happy Today’, to the inspiring ‘Keep Hope Alive’, then on to ‘Hamas: The Faith Triumphant’ to the great Bushism of ‘Beating About the Bush.’
“Thank you also for everything from ‘Water Extinguishes Fire’ and ‘My Barber and My Dandruff’ to the February tributes ‘Remembering Imam Hassan Al-Banna’; ‘Remembering Malcolm X’ and ‘Remembering Murtala Muhammad’. Thank you also for ‘A Letter from Ouagadougou’ as well as the hilarious ‘The Husband of Mrs Wang’.
“And thank you Mallam for ‘A Letter from Madina’, ‘A Letter from Mecca and ‘Riyal’ (just 23 years ago – I weep for my beloved Nigeria). The biggest thank you is for ‘DUBAI’ and the final for the year, ‘Good Luck’. Mallam, I wish you good luck!”