Balancing work, life and family

Cynthia went to hell and back after going one week without her daughter who had been kidnapped. Regardless how horrifying the experience was, the mother of two said, “I know it’s on account of work that I left the house on a Saturday. But I’m not going to stop working because we need all the […]

Cynthia went to hell and back after going one week without her daughter who had been kidnapped. Regardless how horrifying the experience was, the mother of two said, “I know it’s on account of work that I left the house on a Saturday. But I’m not going to stop working because we need all the extra money we can make to support the family.  “I can’t leave my job. It’s not even something I would consider for the sake of my children because my family needs every extra penny that comes in so that we can afford even the very basic necessities.
“But this experience has thought me to prioritise and to learn to say no when I have to,” she said.
This is a situation that many of us are usually faced with, though sometimes it may not be this grave. Regardless, there is need for everyone to apply balance to their work, family and life so that none suffers.
For Edidem John, “It can be quite overwhelming when we try to satisfy all the demands around us. It’s a situation that could be compared to being jack of all trade and master of none. In trying to do it all, in many cases, we end up doing a shoddy job and making a mess of everything.
The chartered surveyor said, “But over time I have realized that setting things in order of preference or importance is the best way to go. At some points, family is top on my list. At some other time, work is and my social life is top at some other times. My believe is that you cannot ignore one completely because they each need nurturing and attention otherwise your life will be full of conflicts.”
“I’ve been faced with a situation where my child was ill and I had to make a presentation at work that morning,” the father of two said. “You should not have to neglect one to take care of the other, so determine which one is the most pressing at the time. I decided to make an appearance at work, formally take an excuse and handed the PowerPoint materials to another colleague who made the presentations on my behalf. It’s not always this easy and making such decisions can be challenging. But at this point my child’s health was far more important to me and I wasn’t going to beat myself for not being there to make the presentations myself.”
In the past, from the beginning of the week, Ese Otaru made a list of the things she hoped to achieve. “I tried very hard to stick with it and it was difficult to accommodate other things that weren’t originally on the plan.”
She said, “As a young mother it was very difficult for me to sometimes prioritise my work over my family or even create room to socialise. After a while I realized I was losing touch with my siblings and friends because the only socializing I was doing was with the TV.
“It dawned on me one day that my children will soon be grown and out of the house and by then I would have lost touch with everybody. It was then I decided that I would begin to create time to spend with others outside my immediate nuclear family. I redirected my weekly calendar to include these and made sure I fulfilled them.”
Learning very fast, the mother of three took advantages of the spare times that work and family allowed her to even have alone times with herself. “I did this by sending my children to their friends and grandparents for weekends and holidays.”
In all of this time is of the essence and managing it well makes all the difference. Abba Sani Hassan explains that organizing oneself is key to being able to balance one’s activities.
According to the medical doctor, “If you plan your time properly, there is no reason why you cannot give your job, family and self the best of you. This also means that one knows when to the day ends for work and when it begins for home.
Assertiveness is also a great asset to have to be able to effectively balance all spheres of life; to be able to say no and stick with it, said the Utako resident.
He added that, “If you are in a relationship, it also helps to discuss issues with your partner and see how he or she can come in and make things easier for you.”
Married for nine years now, Hassan, says it’s no use trying to do it all on your own.
Above all, it is important for one to have justification for whatever he or she does with their time. There won’t be a perfect person in this regard but choosing the right career is vital for couples, assuming the husband is a teacher and the wife an accountant, the home front would always have someone to see to the need of the children.