Between financial prudence and love for a child

A friend narrated how her daughter always complained that she didn’t give her enough money to take to school. “She always complains that some her friends bring up to a thousand naira or more to school every day, while I give her two hundred naira daily. I was shocked, what right thinking parent gives their child […]

A friend narrated how her daughter always complained that she didn’t give her enough money to take to school. “She always complains that some her friends bring up to a thousand naira or more to school every day, while I give her two hundred naira daily. I was shocked, what right thinking parent gives their child who is in junior secondary school a thousand naira or more every day for break?”

I advised that she should draw the attention of the school authorities to the insecurities such attitude may rub off on her child at such tender age. And yes, I agree with her, what do such parents tend to achieve with such, because if you ask me, that is not love but absolute destruction.

Ijeoma Azubike, 39 year-old business entrepreneur, says, “Many people think that buy giving children more money than they need is a way of showing love. Giving your children too much money is not a healthy way of demonstrating your love for them instead it’s a dangerously negative path to destruction. Parents who give so much money to their children don’t understand the damage they do these kid until it’s too late.”

Amina Umar, 40 year-old banker says, “Growing up, my parents were very strict with us handling money, to a point we termed them as stingy. They always told us that money was the root of all evil. My parents always preached generosity, but we could not understand why they were not generous to us. But as adults and parents now, we understand why there were strict with us when it concerns money. I wish people will get to understand the difference between generosity and prudence.”

Hafsah Shuaibu, 40 year-old accountant, says,  “My husband and I decided from the start that we will make sure we provide the basic needs of the children and never over pamper them with providing what isn’t a necessity. We took this decision because we saw the damage access to too much money have had on children of the rich. So under providing is what we do because we believe under providing is far better than over providing, because it will make the child to work harder to be better in future. Underproviding does not kill or harm a child but will most likely make that child successful. But over providing will most certainly ruin the child of which the parents will always regret for the rest of their lives.”

Folake Adebola, 39 year-old protocol officer, says,  “It’s ridiculous. I once had to confront the school authorities for one of my children’s school when the stories she always told me about her class mates and money spending became too much. It was horrific to actually see for myself the amount of money some of the students had on them during school hours, as a parent I was intimidated not to talk of any other under privileged student. A lot of children from rich homes are reckless with money and it’s a shame that their parents are not teaching them financial prudence. Providing them with too much money isn’t love and not the best way to bring up a child. Finance management should be taught just like cooking, cleaning, manners and other etiquettes are taught.”

No matter how wealthy you are never make so much money available to your children. Be prudent in giving them money; make them account for the every kobo you give them. As parents we all want to make sure we provide the best for our children but sometimes we need to just step back and allow them learn that they have to work hard for it. The need to also know and learn from now that there will always be tough times and the money may not be there every day. They need to start learning the essence of investing and saving not matter how little. Always resist that love and urge to give them any more money than they need. Finally always make them account for every money spent.