Can love survive if a woman earns more?

From creation, men were given the sole responsibility of taking care of the family by providing the needs of everyone irrespective of whether the wife works or not. However, with the global turn of events like development, technological advancement, economic recession, women became career-driven and as a result, many today occupy top positions in organizations […]

From creation, men were given the sole responsibility of taking care of the family by providing the needs of everyone irrespective of whether the wife works or not. However, with the global turn of events like development, technological advancement, economic recession, women became career-driven and as a result, many today occupy top positions in organizations where they work.

This increases their chances of earning better salaries than their spouses. This extra income earned by the woman which should be a blessing to the home has turned out to be a source of intimidation for most men, who feel that their God-assigned role is being taken over by their spouses.

A cross section of Nigerians told Lifextra what they feel about this issue. One of them, Rachael Ngadi, a fresh graduate, doesn’t like the idea because the man would complain and also leave so many responsibilities for her. So, it would be better if the man earned more. “No, the man should earn more than me,” she said.

Aseogwu Christine, a student, wouldn’t mind if his income is quite reasonable. Explaining further, she added “I mean someone whose income complements mine in such a way that I don’t feel he’s dependent on me.

However, Afolabi Niyi, a chemical engineer, says “Why not, as long as we both love each other very much, and as long as I can survive on my personal earnings. My needs are important too and what if you can’t survive with my personal earnings? He went on to add that an individual’s survival shouldn’t be in excess of what he needs.

“I’m always content with what I have. Since the man is the head, he will always be the head. My earnings should cover most of our needs in the home if not all but hers can be for support,” he said.

Lawal Yusuf, a civil servant, told Lifextra that initially he got annoyed when his wife asked him for everything. “But If I get married again, I’d prefer to marry someone who earns better than me because she will in one way or the other help me in supporting our children.”

Nura Abubakar, a lecturer, responded with an emphatic yes, and when Lifextra asked if he didn’t expect any problems with it, he responded thus “I think the biggest problem is when women are marginalized in a patriarchal society like ours. I won’t marry a woman who’ll stay at home listening to and obeying my commands like a small god.”

He gave specifications about the type of woman he would want to get married to. He said, “The kind of woman I want to marry is someone who’s as educated as I am or even better; someone who knows her rights. So imagine who that woman could be. Probably richer than me; I think it’s time to face the realities of the 21st Century. If we give equal chance to everyone regardless of gender, ethnicity or religion, the world would be a better place

“I know it sounds weird, but that’s me. I always have the feeling that women need equal opportunities as men.”

“If you look at Nigeria today, the most substantial home is where both husband and wife work and earn for the family, not where the  woman is just a housewife,” he concluded.

From Paul Adepoju’s view point, the university lecturer says that how much his spouse earns is quite infinitesimal to what marriage is. Someone that earns more this month may earn less next year, and vice versa. Love and compatibility are two things that my almost a year in marriage have thought me are really critical. “I married my wife without even thinking about what she earns because it is not an issue for me, but not for everyone else. I know some ladies; the materialistic and shallow minded ones, whose parents don’t earn much, are only interested in guys with fat salaries.”

He gave a food for thought to guys in a relationship with such ladies “I strongly recommend they move on or they will spend the rest of their lives with someone who only sees them as meal ticket and guarantee to a wealthy life. Simply put: lazy gold diggers with very low IQ.”