Do looks matter after marriage?

The question asked by many is ‘why do some women stop taking care of their bodies after marriage’? Is a woman’s looks after marriage an issue to the husband? The opinions of a number of people are as divergent as they are interesting.Lanre Olajumo, a graphic designer, married for four years, opines that: “My wife’s […]

The question asked by many is ‘why do some women stop taking care of their bodies after marriage’? Is a woman’s looks after marriage an issue to the husband? The opinions of a number of people are as divergent as they are interesting.
Lanre Olajumo, a graphic designer, married for four years, opines that: “My wife’s looks are very important to me. Before I married her, she was dressing well, applied make-up and did her hair regularly; that should not stop because I like it. I have seen some women who get uncontrollably fat and hide under the shadow of childbirth, to me that is not an excuse. A woman should know how to take good care of herself, exercise to keep in shape when necessary, make your hair when due and always wear good clothes. Your husband should be able to admire you always.”
Ifeanyi Ajumuo, an engineer who married, believes that a woman’s beauty should start blossoming after marriage: “The moment a woman gets married, she should immediately make efforts to always look good. I don’t expect to come back from work and see my wife tying wrapper, her hair un-made or wearing hair net. I expect her to always look appealing to me. She should exercise to keep in shape, I want a situation where when we go out they would see her as my younger sister and not my grandmother.”
Temmi Ope, a 32-year-old newly wedded man, immediately frowned when the question was put to him: “I don’t want to think that in the next five years I won’t be attracted to my wife because of how she looks, I expect she takes good care of herself. She should mind her weight because I dislike fatness, I want her to always look pretty as she does now, she should also make an effort after childbirth to still look appealing. I intend helping her in that aspect, we would always go jogging together so that she would be fit and still have a good shape.”
 Ude Ona, a stock broker, who has been married for years, said: “I really don’t mind how my wife looks because it is not easy for a woman to maintain herself, especially after childbirth. Hormones change her general look, what I expect from my wife is to take care of the home and children. I also believe when we got married, we both knew we would get old and weary, so the eventual looks of my wife are what I would have to accept and not love her any less than I already do.”
Ahmed Jibril, a 40-year-old businessman, was very blunt in his response: “My wife’s looks mean a great deal to me; I can’t feel comfortable with a woman who is not well kept or who doesn’t know how to take good care of herself. My wife should see taking care of her body and dressing well as major priority, I as a man wouldn’t mind buying all the necessary materials just to make my wife look good, but if I notice any resistance from her to look good, it automatically means she has given me the license to look outside.” Jibril went on to narrate an experience he had at an occasion: “I went for a wedding with my wife and I was so proud when someone admired my wife’s looks, even after having three kids. That made me very happy and even more attracted to her.”
Halima Gambo, a teacher and a mother of four, said: “Although a woman’s life and general looks change after childbirth, every woman should strive to still look good for her husband. I must confess, it is not easy having to be dedicated to work, your children, husband and taking care of the home, but it is something that should be done. As a woman, you should always look neat and presentable, make your hair, apply make-up, dress properly, especially when you are going out and please mind your body weight, these days fat is not in vogue, many men don’t want to have a sack of rice for a wife.”
Hussein Yahaya, a driver, stated that: “I have two wives and I married them because of the first attraction I had for them, which was their looks. So how can a wife I married refuse to take good care of herself; she needs to always look good for me. I can’t have a wife I would be ashamed of, it would gradually become frustrating. So, I expect my wife to always look her best. I see some women who after having just a child, become like the mother of the man, things like this make a man look outside of the marriage, it encourages infidelity in men. Every woman should strive to keep her man by doing what he likes.”
Farouk Radwan explains in an article titled: ‘Why women let themselves go after marriage,’ that many women loose interest motivation to look good after marriage. “Looking good was never a priority: People always find ways to do the important things they care about. When a person finds himself uninterested in something he usually comes up with an excuse such as I don’t have enough time. After marriage most women become more busy taking care of the house and the children and as a result many of them start claiming that they don’t have enough time to take care of their looks while the truth is that looking good was never one of their priorities,” Radwan surmises.