Emergency sicknesses and the de-goatification process

Of late, I have been doing a national research into sleep deprivation and may soon release my findings on how they affect the de-goatification process. This is expedient because Naija people have shown uncommon ingratitude to patriots who sacrificed their sleep and health for goats to freely eat yams. For their uncommon patriotism, they are […]

Of late, I have been doing a national research into sleep deprivation and may soon release my findings on how they affect the de-goatification process. This is expedient because Naija people have shown uncommon ingratitude to patriots who sacrificed their sleep and health for goats to freely eat yams. For their uncommon patriotism, they are being vilified in the media.
For eight years, the Wizard of Ota worked himself to the bones for Naija and leapt from prison inmate to billionaire at the end of it all. It was a great sacrifice. But an ungrateful nation heckles him on Halliburton and other deals even forgetting that all his shares were put in blind trust while he ruined the nation without vacation for eight years! His deputy, a businessman, multi-billion Naira school proprietor and employer of labour lately sacrificed personal born-to-rule ambition for Sai Baba. He transferred his political assets for his success at the polls. He was not corrupt even if his principal thinks otherwise and to show patriotism, he would not be running for public office until Sai Baba is finally tired and retired.
If there be corruption under Umaru, death has absolved him, so let’s move to our beloved, gentle, amiable and soft spoken President Jones. Thus far, the only thing anyone could accuse President Jones of is confessing that under him, stealing is not corruption. It was the ground rules he set and members of his cabinet obeyed it with unflinching loyalty. In Okeagi, where yam farming is a major trade, the closest our goats get to yams is eating the yam peels. When I’m invited to Otuoke I intend to compare the size of their goats with those in Okeagi and let you know.
I have rummaged through Sai Baba’s speeches since May 2015 and I am yet to see that he has rewritten the rules of engagement aside from promising to fight corruption, without training with Floyd Mayweather. As far as body language goes, it would appear that presently, there are two rules of engagement – one philosophy holds some people answerable to prosecution on mere allegations while the other makes those accused selectable for public office. Is it that the other group is immune from prosecution? Far from it, it would appear that proof of their culpability or innocence is held in blind trust until 2019 or later.
As a result, those waiting for Rotimi Chibuike Amaechi to appear before CCT, EFCC or the courts of law must pray to live longer than 2019. Those who think that Babatunde Raji Fashola sunk the most expensive borehole in the history of ground water exploration and built the most expensive website since Tim Barnes Lee toyed with the idea of the Internet would have to wait. Those who think that Abubakar Audu should not have been endorsed APC candidate in Kogi because of the N11 billion fraud allegations hanging on his neck would have to pray to live longer.
By luck, Bukola Saraki can breathe easy on his sinnate seat as trial for his alleged anticipatory asset declaration is now blowing in the wind. Above all, those daring to ask how Sai Baba moved from having only one house and a few goats in Daura to having five houses without evidence of ‘gainful employment’ would have to wait. Those who want learn from Osinbajo how to make $900,000 liquid cash from law and politics would have to wait.
What worries me for now is how to avoid keeping public officers working for four years without leave. It is against ILO rules and according to WebMD, an online health portal; sleep deprivation can lead to serious psychological and mental health issues. Patriots such as Madame Diezani Allison-Madueke suffered national burnout as a result of patriotism. She kept every oil deal under her globe even as her health deteriorated. Such uncommon patriotism cannot be diminished by allegations of corruption now flying all over cyberspace with no scintilla of proof other than the £27,000 that walked into her London garage overnight without legs.
Sambo Dasuki ex-colonel and ex-NSA watched as his health deteriorated while an alleged $2.9 billion and paltry N643.8 billion arms cash was misappropriated. If he had slept well, he may have seen corruption there. Ibrahim Lamorde was busy entering plea bargain for yam-eating goats until allegations surfaced that he diverted N1 trillion, suddenly his health deteriorated so much he now wants to go abroad for medical treatment – another victim of uncommon patriotism even at the detriment of his own health.
All these people are now suffering for their consummate patriotism but rather than appreciate their contributions to the goatification of the nation, they are being vilified. Sai Baba should lead by example by issuing an executive order that every public official must pay attention to their health. They must take their annual leave or lose their job. That way, when they’re dropped or retired, they won’t develop emergency sicknesses that require treatment that Naija doctors and its failing consulting clinics cannot provide.