How to cope with change… and survive!
Many of us must have come face to face with many challenging events or situations we never bargained for. As they say ‘the only constant thing in life is change’. Changes, whether you prepare for it or not, are bound to happen in our lives, but how do we cope with such changes if they […]
Many of us must have come face to face with many challenging events or situations we never bargained for. As they say ‘the only constant thing in life is change’. Changes, whether you prepare for it or not, are bound to happen in our lives, but how do we cope with such changes if they eventually happen to us especially negative ones? Some changes that happen are for the best while others are for the worse, but then no matter the circumstances. there are effective ways of managing and coping with any eventual change in our lives.
Life, by its nature, determines that we will have to face in our lives. Of course, some changes are far more dramatic than others and also some people cope better with changes than others. To many people, accepting the inevitability of change produces stress, and physical and emotional symptoms. Most people see change is a beast threatening their status quo, their sense of security, and need for control.
Change demands that we let go of the security blankets of our past ways of doing things in order to embrace new challenges and opportunities for growth. We have the illusion that we can manage change by controlling our environment, however, change can truly only be managed from within ourselves. Gandhi said, you must be the change you wish to see in the world. Striving to develop an open mind and flexibility in the face of change is the most effective way of dealing with change. By relaxing your hold on the past, you can learn new ways as most of us feel we can hardly survive once there is a slight change in our lives.
Alexander Graham Bell wrote: When one door closes, another door opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the ones which are open for us.
Coming to terms with change requires looking at life through new lenses, adjusting your frame of references. In managing change effectively, what is most vital is having the right attitude with a positive outlook. This would provide the flexibility factor in the face of change. “many times I have been faced with change in different situations and I just gave up on the whole situation, I was not patient enough to think things over, maybe if I had been more calm and enduring, I would have been able to see better things ahead that came through that change. For I now believe that every change God allows to happen in your life, there is a purpose. It is just left for you to find the door which has opened up for you,” says Biodun Jaye.
For many it seems like the end of the world. “there have been times when I felt that I could not carry on with life because I was finding it difficult to adjust to change. The change came so drastically and almost immediately. I was used to the good things of life and never had any compassion for those who were managing with life but things changed and I was placed in the shoes of those who had to beg to survive. Only then did I realize how insensitive and inhuman I have been in life. I believe there was a reason for the change in my life and I am glad that it has a made a positive impact on me. Change always has something in stalk no matter what. All we need is to take a drastic look at the whole situation and you will be able to adjust almost immediately,” said Jafar Abdul.
“A life without change is one that is doomed. I have come to realise that life is all about change, there is nothing constant in life no matter what. Life is really a never ending spiral of change if I can borrow the words. Change in our lives only makes us stronger and wiser. Facing changes wisely rather than running away from them is the best thing you can do for yourself if you ever find yourself in such a situation,” said Binta Ahmed.
To be comfortable with change we, need some fixed and unchangeable points of reference. In our world, virtually everything is changing. A person feels anxious and insecure. However, with some fixed points of reference we become more secure and be able to face any change rationally. Assuming change is a normal, natural part of life helps you to deal more effectively with it. When you think you cannot survive the change look back at your life and you will be surprised the changes you have been able to come without paying any particular attention to it. We can survive and thrive through it with ease and comfort. Remember, the God who was there through change in the past will be there with us through future change.