How women’s poor cooking habit ruins homes

An African idiom says ‘the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach’, underlining the need for women to be masters at cooking good meals to keep their spouses ever desirous and sure of a delicious meal at home, or lose them to those that are professionals in this field. Poor cooking habit among […]

An African idiom says ‘the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach’, underlining the need for women to be masters at cooking good meals to keep their spouses ever desirous and sure of a delicious meal at home, or lose them to those that are professionals in this field.

Poor cooking habit among women is at an alarming proportion in today’s society as most of them now choose to develop their careers as against devoting time for the home front. Most homes have been ruined because the woman cannot cook simple tasteful meal. Generally, food is one of the basic necessities of life, growth and development and constitutes a source of great happiness when prepared properly.

 Recently, a 57-year-old man in a Lagos court dissolved his marriage of 25 years to his wife because of poor cooking habit and a  Nyanya Customary Court in Abuja in November last year in a divorce suit, dissolved a 22-year-old marriage between a driver and his wife over her habit of cooking only once a week.

To avoid issues of divorce in marriage, a popular pastor in Nigeria had charged the male faithful not to marry a woman that could not cook because they cannot afford to always eat out.

Danjuma Abdullahi (not real name) who got married about  six months ago, recently sent his wife back to her parents to go and learn how to cook better. He had not been eating well since they got married.

“Anytime I ask her to cook, I get angry because she always appeared uncertain of where to start from. The only thing she knew how to cook was noodles and probably how to prepare tea but even common ‘tuwo’ she cannot prepare,” he said.

Abdullahi said he had to send her back to her parents so that they can teach her at least the basics, then she can come back because he cannot be married and still live like a bachelor.

“Any time I want to eat good food I have to go to a restaurant or make it myself, so what is the essence of having a wife?,” he said.

Hajiya Amina Musa who shared her experience with her husband in the early days of their marriage, told this reporter that she had problems with her husband as a newly wedded wife because she could not cook well.

“Each time I cooked, he would start frowning because it was either there was too much salt or oil, or he would say the food was half done,” she said.

Amina confessed that her problem was that she was not used to the kitchen back in her parents’ home because they had house helps who did the cooking, washing and cleaning even to the point of making their beds. 

She explained that she overcame the problem by registering in a catering school where she learnt the art of good cooking.

A housewife, Mrs Sarah Adam, attributed such situation to negligence and too much pampering on the side of mothers, adding that most mothers today do not allow their female children into the kitchen simply because they have maids.

“House chores and cooking are left in the hands of house maids because mothers no longer invite their girl-child into the kitchen. 

“All that most girls know how to do in today’s society is makeup, browse the internet looking at celebs and watch movies, then when food is ready, they will be served by the house helps,” she said.

She advised mothers to teach their daughters how to cook early so that when they grow up, they can handle their homes properly.

A marriage counsellor, Mrs Comfort Daniel, said the background of every woman is important when issues that threaten the marriage begin to crop up in the home.

She said women should know that they are married to complement their husbands, adding that one of the ways to do that is through good meal and intercourse.

“The meal must be balanced, tasteful and well presented. There are some men who don’t like crossing their taste; for example, they prefer their traditional food than any other food and as a woman you have to learn and not imposing your own on him,” the marriage counsellor said.

She said men, too have a role to play here, adding that the man can introduce the wife to people or where she can learn or register her in a catering service institute where she can learn the skill of cooking good meals.

“The man can also buy books on cooking for her and also introduce her to people that can teach her without necessarily exposing her. A lot of positive result has been generated through this means,” Mrs Daniel stated.