I regret how my husband abused me, says British woman

Sacha Kingston is a 45-year-old Briton who was formerly married to a Nigerian from the South-south Zone and gave birth to five children.  She claims that she suffered different types of abuse in the hands of her former husband while rights and women organisations declined to come to her aid and save her her marriage […]

Sacha Kingston is a 45-year-old Briton who was formerly married to a Nigerian from the South-south Zone and gave birth to five children.
 She claims that she suffered different types of abuse in the hands of her former husband while rights and women organisations declined to come to her aid and save her her marriage from collapse.
She now prays that women groups and other charity organisations should be vocal to save increasing numbers of women suffering from many forms of domestic abuse.
 Sacha said: “I was married to a Nigerian. I had enjoyed it all until he began to abuse me. I was a victim of home violence. People do not understand it till they have experienced it.”
 She says that it was more painful to her when neither the husband’s family nor any public support groups came to her rescue. In the United Kingdom, women or men who suffer from domestic abuse could seek help.
“In Nigeria a victim of abuse is entirely on his or her own,” she laments. “For me, as a foreign woman, no one believed me when I sought help.”
She alleged that even the police were in her former husband’s pocket, adding: “It is not good that there are no visible women’s groups to help fellow women who are abused.”
Sacha calls on women’s groups to rise and protect womenfolk, asking: “Why do men think it is okay to beat, starve or rape their wives?
 
“As a person, I lost almost everything because my ex-husband thought it was okay to beat and starve me. I have strong views on this matter. I regret to say that families in Nigeria often help the perpetrators of home violence, instead of the victim. Yet, I do not regret having married a Nigerian man however because it has enabled me to learn a lot. 
“What I regret is that he abused me, instead of valuing me. Do not get me wrong, not all men abuse women. But I would not wish what happened to me to happen to someone else.”
Sacha advises women suffering from abuse in hands of their partner to quit the relationship, saying: “If your partner is abusing you, get out from him because he will not desist. It would just get worse. Women that suffer abuse from their partners should seek help from family or friends. And public charities that deal in this area need to be more visible and vocal.”
 She frowns at how people are treated without respect. “I encourage equality for everyone. Why is one person treated less than another? For instance, is a man more important than a woman, just because she has a womb?
“Women have more rights now which means they do not have to stay at home. Women can be equals, not lesser beings.”
 On how Nigerian women tend to copy lifestyle of their white counterparts, she says: “I don’t see it as such, but it can depend on individual. It is more of a merger–a coming together and understanding each other’s culture.”