Lamido, the latest Salami

ABUSHAY: Jonathan has finally shot himself in the foot on the Sanusi matter. How do you explain the suspension of the central bank governor with only three months remaining in his tenure?SHUMAY: I support the sack. Sanusi has been arrogant and disloyal.ABUSHAY: Disloyal to thieves? I thought a public officer’s loyalty ought to be to […]

ABUSHAY: Jonathan has finally shot himself in the foot on the Sanusi matter. How do you explain the suspension of the central bank governor with only three months remaining in his tenure?
SHUMAY: I support the sack. Sanusi has been arrogant and disloyal.
ABUSHAY: Disloyal to thieves? I thought a public officer’s loyalty ought to be to the nation and not to individuals?
SHUMAY: Say what you will; there can’t be two presidents in one country. Sanusi had been behaving as if he was an alternate president or something like that.
ABUSHAY: Who tells you there can’t be two presidents in one country? We already have four – Jonathan, his wife Patience, Petroleum Minister Diezani Alison-Madueke and Edwin Clark.
SHUMAY: There you go with cheap blackmail.
ABUSHAY: No, not blackmail. I don’t know what you are gaining in this retrogressive arrangement called government but I’m shocked that people like you continue to push Jonathan to commit political suicide by encouraging corruption and sacking whistle blowers.
SHUMAY: Stop there! What corruption? Is Lamido himself not corrupt? Have you read the report of the Financial Reporting Council on his tenure which was characterised by financial recklessness, misconduct and violation of the laws of the Land?
ABUSHAY: Where was that report before now? You see, the problem Jonathan has is that he thinks we are all idiots. If Lamido was corrupt he should have been dealt with a long time ago. But you keep whatever information you have to yourself to blackmail the man and when he called your bluff you suspend him and release allegations of impropriety to the public. Who is going to believe a president who is well known to keep the company of corrupt people; a president who routinely pardons convicted looters?
SHUMAY: Do you hear yourself? You are a fake patriot. What is wrong if Jonathan exercises his power of prerogative of mercy? Is it because he is from the South-South region that you all treat him with disrespect?
ABUSHAY: I will answer you with a question. Is it because Lamido is not from the South-South that the president suspended him for exposing fraud?
SHUMAY: The president is not concerned with individuals but with institutions. He wants the CBN to survive instead of being dragged into politics by Sanusi.
ABUSHAY: Which president? The same president who has subverted democratic and other institutions in an attempt to win an undeserved second term? Lamido Sanusi was not the first victim and he won’t be the last. Before him there was Justice Salami. Now you talk of commitment to institutions? I beg, tell that to the marines!
SHUMAY: It is bad belle that is worrying all of you. Whether you like it or not Jonathan will win in 2015.
ABUSHAY: God has not abandoned Nigeria to such an extent that we will be saddled with a continuation of this do-nothing govern-ment where a N10 contract is executed at N1, 000 and we are told to clap for the government as if stealing is no longer a crime. We must get rid of Jonathan and his godfathers by 2015. It will happen. You just watch. Many of you, the acolytes, will end up in jail for your crimes.
SHUMAY: Nothing of that sort will happen. All the other parties put together cannot match Jonathan. By the way, who do you want to replace him with –one of your loudmouth hypocrites?
ABUSHAY: Just wait. Don’t jump the gun. We are not as lawless as your party. Already, Jonathan’s campaign has commenced. Virtually every page you open on the internet has a Jonathan advert inviting the surfer to “be a GEJite”. The president himself has been going round traditional rulers seeking support. There are Jonathan posters all over Abuja and Jega’s INEC is looking the other way.
SHUMAY: You see yourself now? Jonathan is not the one who placed the adverts. It’s his admirers and other lovers of Nigeria. He is not jumping the gun. I think you people are jealous because you still can’t find a presidential candidate to oppose him. He is popular in the entire South and in two-thirds of the North. What else is remaining?
ABUSHAY: What is remaining is for you and your ilk to wake up from your delusion. Jonathan already has problems in Rivers State, the biggest state in the South-South. He is a pariah in the three zones of the North and is viewed with amusement in the South-West. His attempt to divide Igboland in a misguided SE/SS alliance and use religion as a trump card will backfire big-time.
SHUMAY: I think you need your head examined. You’re a m@*#βx!! Jonathan is the best president we have had since the return of democracy. His administration has touched the lives of Nigerians positively. I’m not saying that he’s perfect, but he is the best so far. Only idiots like you and the opposition which is already in disarray will ever deny Jonathan’s achievements.
ABUSHAY: Insult is the recourse of freeloaders in government who are contemptuous of those outside their thieving coven. Let’s not lose focus. Don’t divert attention away from the real subject of our argument. Sanusi will emerge unscathed from this orchestrated attempt to tarnish his name. Seize his international passport; prosecute him; send EFCC after him … Remember, Obasanjo emerged from the valley of the shadow of death to become president. Jonathan has misused his place at the top. The only direction he will go now is down.
SHUMAY: Wishful thin-king! Sanusi was a mistake and the president has corrected that mistake.
ABUSHAY: It is Jonathan that was a mistake from Day 1. We should just have bought him a pair of shoes instead of unleashing him on our long-suffering people. Now that he has more than 1,000 pairs of shoes he is worse than he ever was.
SHUMAY: To hell with you!
ABUSHAY: Same to you.

As we settled down for an elbow-raising exercise at an Utako watering hole, it was the issue of the suspension of Sanusi Lamido Sanusi, substantive governor of the Central Bank, which agitated the minds of the revellers. Abushay and Shumay dug into each other’s hides as they perched in irreconcilably different camps. This reporter was there.
ABUSHAY: Jonathan has finally shot himself in the foot on the Sanusi matter. How do you explain the suspension of the central bank governor with only three months remaining in his tenure?
SHUMAY: I support the sack. Sanusi has been arrogant and disloyal.
ABUSHAY: Disloyal to thieves? I thought a public officer’s loyalty ought to be to the nation and not to individuals?
SHUMAY: Say what you will; there can’t be two presidents in one country. Sanusi had been behaving as if he was an alternate president or something like that.
ABUSHAY: Who tells you there can’t be two presidents in one country? We already have four – Jonathan, his wife Patience, Petroleum Minister Diezani Alison-Madueke and Edwin Clark.
SHUMAY: There you go with cheap blackmail.
ABUSHAY: No, not blackmail. I don’t know what you are gaining in this retrogressive arrangement called government but I’m shocked that people like you continue to push Jonathan to commit political suicide by encouraging corruption and sacking whistle blowers.
SHUMAY: Stop there! What corruption? Is Lamido himself not corrupt? Have you read the report of the Financial Reporting Council on his tenure which was characterised by financial recklessness, misconduct and violation of the laws of the Land?
ABUSHAY: Where was that report before now? You see, the problem Jonathan has is that he thinks we are all idiots. If Lamido was corrupt he should have been dealt with a long time ago. But you keep whatever information you have to yourself to blackmail the man and when he called your bluff you suspend him and release allegations of impropriety to the public. Who is going to believe a president who is well known to keep the company of corrupt people; a president who routinely pardons convicted looters?
SHUMAY: Do you hear yourself? You are a fake patriot. What is wrong if Jonathan exercises his power of prerogative of mercy? Is it because he is from the South-South region that you all treat him with disrespect?
ABUSHAY: I will answer you with a question. Is it because Lamido is not from the South-South that the president suspended him for exposing fraud?
SHUMAY: The president is not concerned with individuals but with institutions. He wants the CBN to survive instead of being dragged into politics by Sanusi.
ABUSHAY: Which president? The same president who has subverted democratic and other institutions in an attempt to win an undeserved second term? Lamido Sanusi was not the first victim and he won’t be the last. Before him there was Justice Salami. Now you talk of commitment to institutions? I beg, tell that to the marines!
SHUMAY: It is bad belle that is worrying all of you. Whether you like it or not Jonathan will win in 2015.
ABUSHAY: God has not abandoned Nigeria to such an extent that we will be saddled with a continuation of this do-nothing govern-ment where a N10 contract is executed at N1, 000 and we are told to clap for the government as if stealing is no longer a crime. We must get rid of Jonathan and his godfathers by 2015. It will happen. You just watch. Many of you, the acolytes, will end up in jail for your crimes.
SHUMAY: Nothing of that sort will happen. All the other parties put together cannot match Jonathan. By the way, who do you want to replace him with –one of your loudmouth hypocrites?
ABUSHAY: Just wait. Don’t jump the gun. We are not as lawless as your party. Already, Jonathan’s campaign has commenced. Virtually every page you open on the internet has a Jonathan advert inviting the surfer to “be a GEJite”. The president himself has been going round traditional rulers seeking support. There are Jonathan posters all over Abuja and Jega’s INEC is looking the other way.
SHUMAY: You see yourself now? Jonathan is not the one who placed the adverts. It’s his admirers and other lovers of Nigeria. He is not jumping the gun. I think you people are jealous because you still can’t find a presidential candidate to oppose him. He is popular in the entire South and in two-thirds of the North. What else is remaining?
ABUSHAY: What is remaining is for you and your ilk to wake up from your delusion. Jonathan already has problems in Rivers State, the biggest state in the South-South. He is a pariah in the three zones of the North and is viewed with amusement in the South-West. His attempt to divide Igboland in a misguided SE/SS alliance and use religion as a trump card will backfire big-time.
SHUMAY: I think you need your head examined. You’re a m@*#βx!! Jonathan is the best president we have had since the return of democracy. His administration has touched the lives of Nigerians positively. I’m not saying that he’s perfect, but he is the best so far. Only idiots like you and the opposition which is already in disarray will ever deny Jonathan’s achievements.
ABUSHAY: Insult is the recourse of freeloaders in government who are contemptuous of those outside their thieving coven. Let’s not lose focus. Don’t divert attention away from the real subject of our argument. Sanusi will emerge unscathed from this orchestrated attempt to tarnish his name. Seize his international passport; prosecute him; send EFCC after him … Remember, Obasanjo emerged from the valley of the shadow of death to become president. Jonathan has misused his place at the top. The only direction he will go now is down.
SHUMAY: Wishful thin-king! Sanusi was a mistake and the president has corrected that mistake.
ABUSHAY: It is Jonathan that was a mistake from Day 1. We should just have bought him a pair of shoes instead of unleashing him on our long-suffering people. Now that he has more than 1,000 pairs of shoes he is worse than he ever was.
SHUMAY: To hell with you!
ABUSHAY: Same to you.