My end of the road (II)

‘Of course you have somewhere to go’ Asabe protested, ‘you know you can come to me. You know you’ll always have a home with me.’ She emphasised. ‘But I can only land you in trouble if I moved in with you. In fact it is the first place they’ll look for me, when they hear […]

‘Of course you have somewhere to go’ Asabe protested, ‘you know you can come to me. You know you’ll always have a home with me.’ She emphasised.

‘But I can only land you in trouble if I moved in with you. In fact it is the first place they’ll look for me, when they hear that I am in this town, and they’ll accuse you of aiding me to end my marriage. This is why I came straight to Anti Bint’s house to avoid running into any of our relatives in your house. Believe me the way my father feels about this, he’ll go to any lengths to find out where I am, and when he hears that I am with you then may God help you against his temper.’ Hafsa explained.

‘Yes I know about Uncle Ibrahim’s phenomenal temper, but on an issue such as this, I am willing to face even him. Imagine being forced to live with an unapologetic, adulterous husband just because he’s rich. No, I am certainly willing to face your father on this. Of course I will be accused of encouraging you because I am also divorced and am probably seen as someone who doesn’t respect the marriage institution any more, but I can risk all that to make the point that you should be allowed to choose the fate of your marriage.’ Asabe asserted.

‘Thank you, thank you so much Anti Asabe, may Allah reward your loyalty and sacrifice with the best of  results, amin.’ Hafsa responded, the tears flowing freely on her face.

‘Is there anyone close to him that you know? Because I can’t see this problem getting solved unless there is someone we can approach to help you from his own side. ‘ I observed.

‘Well I met him through my uncle Abubakar. He introduced us to each other when I went to spend the weekend with his family. In the evening, after dinner, my Aunt directed me to take tea to my uncle and his visitor. Apparently Tanko expressed interest in me after I’d served them and left. So my uncle told his wife and they arranged for us to meet the next day. At first I was put off by his age. I mean he looked older than Uncle Abubakar, so I told my uncle that his friend was too old for me. But he prevailed on me with the encouragement that the man was divorced and his three children live with their mother, so it would almost be like marrying a young, unmarried man. While my uncle was doing his verbal campaigns, Tanko himself was doing his practical one.

Every day he had an expensive gift to send to me. Perfumes, jewellery, clothes, cash, there was nothing he will not send. I suppose a combination of these and my father’s enthusiasm got me to cave in. I found myself thinking: What have I got to lose by marrying him? And that was how I ended up married to him. I will be lying if I said I was ever in love with him. But he was kind and considerate and really knew how to make me happy, so I began to like him and even enjoy his company. But apart from some elderly men who represented him during our marriage, I know of no one close to him except Uncle Abu.’ She concluded.

‘Well in that case we better start looking for your uncle. If you are sure you don’t want to get back to your husband, then he is the one person who can ensure that this man releases you from the bond of marriage. If however you want to give your husband a second chance, then we can still reach out to your uncle and get him to drum some home truths into his head.’ I advised.

‘I certainly don’t want to go back to him. I caught him red-handed remember, in addition to that he looked at me remorselessly and said he could never be satisfied with one woman. Anti Bint, what is there to go back to? In any case he had destroyed any feelings of respect I have for him and l can never trust him no matter how I try. I believe that a marriage without trust and respect is nothing but a recipe for disaster.’ Hafsa explained.

‘Yes you are right. In fact trust and respect are the backbone of any marriage. A marriage devoid of these two is a sham. So Asabe, we will have to speak to Uncle Abubakar and get him to talk to his friend. Hafsa wants a divorce and she should have one considering the kind of man her husband has turned out to be. How soon should we try him?’ I asked.

‘This evening, if I can help it. We must not waste any time in getting Hafsa her freedom. My only concern is, you Hafsa have grown used to so much luxury and wealth in the last two years. You had everything you wanted by merely asking for it. In fact most times you didn’t even need to ask. I fear for you a situation in which you will suffer from withdrawal syndrome because my home is nowhere near as luxurious as yours, nor is my life half as comfortable. Are you ready for a new life in which you will have to fend for yourself most of the time and eat ordinary simple meals, not the exotic cuisines your professional cook is used to making? I mean I do have house-helps as you know, but it isn’t the kind of arrangement you are used to.’ Asabe declared.

‘Yes, I know Anti Asabe, I will surely adjust to life in your home because that was what I was used to before my marriage.’ She hastened to assure her cousin. ‘As for regrets, I am sure I will never regret walking out of this marriage because I have seen the very worst of it. All the luxury I enjoyed was like one long dream and now I am awake. Unfortunately it took a nightmare to wake me up but better late than never. I am glad I have awoken in time to see reality before it is too late. I mean if I didn’t catch him and he continued this way, I may only get to know about his wild lifestyle by the time I am infected with some sexually transmitted disease or even AIDS. Truly, I feel nothing but gratitude to God that I have escaped before I got destroyed.’ She answered.

‘Have you thought of what you’ll do now or as soon as he gives you a divorce?’ I asked.

‘Well now that I have a place to call home. I think I will look for an Islamiyya school to join and improve my Quranic knowledge. Then when my son gets older I can resume schooling to obtain a university degree. You know I only did an OND when I got married. God knows between my jewellery and endless clothing I have enough to keep me comfortable, so I won’t be a burden on Anti Asabe.’ Hafsa replied.

‘Who said you’ll ever be a burden?’ her cousin protested.

‘No I mean I don’t want to have to ask you for everything, I want to be able to buy my toiletries and baby things.’ She explained.

‘Well, that is settled then. After dinner we will call your uncle Abubakar. Who knows may be with time he might even be able to convince your parents to forget their scandalous in-law and have you back.’ I enthused.

‘May be’, she replied sadly, ‘but I wouldn’t bet on it.’