NBM syndrome

I have been following the Ekweremadu saga, reading the commentaries on social media and in our papers, and I have found it both fascinating and intriguing how so many folks centre the Ekweremadus, completely erasing the young man from the narrative. It’s about what’s happened to them, how their lives have changed, their fall from […]

I have been following the Ekweremadu saga, reading the commentaries on social media and in our papers, and I have found it both fascinating and intriguing how so many folks centre the Ekweremadus, completely erasing the young man from the narrative. It’s about what’s happened to them, how their lives have changed, their fall from grace, how much they love their daughter that they risked their freedom (not like they thought of it as any kind of risk).

When the young man, who was supposed to give up a kidney is mentioned, it is to speculate on his motives for “getting the Ekweremadus in trouble” and how “innocent” he really is “in all of this.” The real victims, some people maintain, are the Ekweremadus. This is a position I struggle with. And one I didn’t think I’d run into quite as much. There must be a term for when people sympathise with wealthy perpetrators of crime rather than their victims. And yes, this young man – whether his real age is 15 or 21 is a victim.

I feel for the Ekweremadu’s daughter who has a kidney condition. I am a parent, and I know how difficult it is to see your child struggle with an ailment, any ailment, not to talk of one as serious as what Miss Ekweremadu has. I understand their desire to move heaven and earth to find her help. And when the road to getting that help seems blocked or ‘unnecessarily’ tedious?

If you suffer from ‘Naija Big Man syndrome’, used to getting your way and solving issues with money, you believe that there is always a way. Ain’t no mountain high enough and all that. Shebi one of our politicians is rumoured to have said that he hasn’t seen any problem yet that money cannot resolve? So need a kidney? Don’t bother with staying on whatever list the proletariats stay on. Find someone, forge what papers you need to forge, pay them same amount as you’d probably spend on a night out for one kidney and expect gratitude.

And gratitude (or the lack of it) is the refrain I keep hearing from those in support of the Ekweremadus. The young man whose kidney was to go to Miss Ekweremadu has been accused of ingratitude. Look at all he stood to gain, they say: the Ekweremadus were giving him a future, 2000 pounds, a trip to London which he’d never have smelled and how does he repay them? There is so much wrong with this line of thinking.

We shouldn’t live in a world where the poor are reduced to selling their organs for money. There is a reason why organ donors are not allowed to do it for money.

The Ekweremadus knew this law existed and lied to cheat the system. They wanted a kidney for their daughter and they went about it the way their money could make it quicker and easier for them to. A  combination of events – not least of all a donor who seemed confused about what he had supposedly ‘volunteered’ to do – led to the plan falling apart.

They are loving, doting parents but they are also exploitative and they broke the law. These truths can exist (and do exist) at the same time. Some have said the young man lied about his ignorance. If he did, then it is ironic that the Ekweremadu’s web of lies was undone by someone else’s web of lies. To some folks, that might be seen as justice.

And the British system does feel justice has been done. I hope lessons have been learned: the privileges attached to the NBM syndrome only take you so far. And the British judiciary no dey fear to jail our big ogas based on the evidence of a “mere nobody.”