One long year without our beloved mother

I never saw her death coming, but she probably did as events later showed. On the very day she passed on – Sunday, December 22, 2013 – I woke up at about 4am and somehow I couldn’t go back to sleep. I decided to hold on until it was time for Subhi prayer. After praying […]

I never saw her death coming, but she probably did as events later showed. On the very day she passed on – Sunday, December 22, 2013 – I woke up at about 4am and somehow I couldn’t go back to sleep. I decided to hold on until it was time for Subhi prayer. After praying at a mosque in my neighbourhood in Gwarinpa, I returned to my house, hoping that I will be able to catch some sleep; I still couldn’t.
Eventually, I decided to kit up and go for morning jogging. I returned home around 8:20am. Upon my return, I found my elder brother, who came to stay with me in Abuja to meet an appointment scheduled for the following day, wide awake. Like me, he also couldn’t go back to sleep after the Subhi prayer. So we got talking and not long after, we fell asleep. But not up to 30 minutes in our sleep, our phones started ringing at the same time; I reached out for my phone which was not far from my pillow, only to hear the grief-stricken voice of my brother Abdulaziz telling me that Ummi (the name we all used to call her) has died. I rose to my feet at once. Suddenly I recalled the day I left Kaduna two weeks before; when I went to bid her farewell, she was still in bed, covered wither blanket – as if she was dead.
Without wasting any time, I placed a call to Abdulhamid, her first son and our elder brother, who was staying at Chanchangi Airline Quarters in Wuse II to inform him of what had happened. He asked us to go and pick him up so we could all proceed to Kaduna. Then, another call came in, this time from Safiyanu, a neighbour and a close friend, who said we should drive carefully, assuring us that he would prevail on people to delay her funeral prayers for us to meet it. That was not possible as he called us again to say that when we arrive we should head straight to the Bachama Road cemetery in Tudun Wada, Kaduna. Our mother’s younger brother, the Chief Imam of Maiduguri Road mosque, UstazDahiruLawalAbubakar, had advised that the funeral prayers should not be delayed, and Safiyanu could not argue with him.
By the time we got to the cemetery, her remains were yet to arrive, when they did Safiyanu was not only leading the coffin but also handed it over to me. That was when I said to myself that it was indeed true that our beloved Ummi was no more. From the length and weight of the coffin, coupled with the cloth used to cover it, I could still see the side of her body.
Immediately after the burial, we left for our residence at Badikko, beside the famous Danfodio mosque. The house was full of people who came from all walks of life to condole with us.
In the evening, I was still burning to know the events that preceded her death, so I asked my younger brother Mu’azu. I really wanted to know  though I was not oblivious of the fact that she was diabetic. Mu’azu told me that she was looking very okay for the past three days. He, however, said that in the morning of the previous day she had complained of not being able to eat and sleep, which was very unusual. He said on the day she died, he had visited her in the morning for the daily routine greetings. “She sat me down, and we had a long talk which ended around 9:30am. She told me that she had a wedding to attend and preach at a residence near the Government House, Kaduna. So she told me that she was going to take her bath and I left to do the same,” he said.
Not long after his bath, Mu’azu told me that he went back to her room only to find our uncle’s wife, who was staying in UnguwarDosa in Kaduna, with her. “I realized something was wrong; I called out her name but she didn’t answer and so I became alarmed. I immediately called our stepmother, our neighbor Alhaji Yahya and his wife Hajiya Maryam to come and see what is happening. Alhaji Yahya brought out his car and we took her to the hospital where she used to go for medical checkup. But on reaching, the doctor confirmed that she had passed on.”
Our mother was only 52 when she passed on but we remain grateful to Almighty Allah for the fruitful life she lived. She spent the most part of her life as a teacher and preacher – she taught Islamic Religious Knowledge (IRK) at the Sheikh Abubakar Gumi Collage and later L.E.A Primary School, Fulani Road Tudun Wada, Kaduna, just as she was a regular face at gatherings of Muslim women. She also authored a number of books including Aure Darajan ‘Ya Mace, which was later translated to English Marriage, The price of a Woman, because of its high demand and Makka da Madinah da Wuraren da ake Karba Addu’a a Wajen Su. She was still working on Aure Garkuwar ‘Ya Mace when she died.
Another thing I will live to appreciate about our mother was that she treated our siblings as her own biological children. She once told me how she used the money she got from my naming ceremony to pay the school fees of our elder brother, the son of one of our two stepmothers. She also got a scholarship for another of our sibling until he completed his higher education. Indeed, there was a time she was given a Hajj seat, but instead of choosing one of us her children to go and perform Hajj, she gave out the seat to our stepmother.
We, her children, also benefitted a lot from her teachings, magnanimity and support. She did her best to see that we prosper in life. She treated us like friends even though most of us her children are male; indeed, she once accompanied me to Saminaka for my friend’s wedding. One of her main advices to us as a mother was never to begrudge people’s success but work towards our own; she taught us to be generous when we have, and to be patient when we don’t; she also taught us respect people for what they are, not for what they have. And she truly practiced what she preached. Every Friday was like a Walima day, she would cook for worshippers who trooped to our house after the juma’ah prayers to eat.
When she realized that women were finding it difficult to worship at the Danfodio mosque, she invited the then Kaduna State First Lady HajiyaAsma’uMakarfi to build a section for women, today women have a secured place at the mosque. She also started an Islamiyya school for women right inside our house, before inviting Alhaji AuwalTahir to lay the foundation of the Islamiyya section at the same Danfodio Mosque which is currently still under construction.  
She left behind 10 children (eight males and two females) namely Abdulhamid, Hamza, Mahmud, Abubakar, Mu’azu, Rabiatu, Ahmad, Atiku, Akilu and Hafsatu. May she continue to rest in peace.
Mansur works at the Building Department, Nigeria Customs Service (NCS) Headquarters, No.3 Abidjan Street Wuse Zone 3, Abuja.