Salvaging my goldmine (II)

‘At this point Mamman dared to remind me that the girls are only fair because of him. That if they had inherited my colour they won’t be the goldmine I am boasting of. And I responded by telling him that I knew I was darker than him but they are only beautiful because they have […]

‘At this point Mamman dared to remind me that the girls are only fair because of him. That if they had inherited my colour they won’t be the goldmine I am boasting of. And I responded by telling him that I knew I was darker than him but they are only beautiful because they have my eyes and long nose. Shaking his head at my reply, he rose and grabbed his car keys, then he looked at me and warned that he will never allow me to have my way on this matter.’ Sahiba concluded.
‘But do you honestly think you are right on this issue? I mean your daughters really are human beings with feelings not items to be advertised.’ I reasoned.
‘Look I am only trying to secure a good future for them. I don’t want them to end up the way I did, in poverty and suffering. Luckily for them, they grew eligible at a time when rich or ready-made bachelors are scrambling for slim, fair-skinned wives. Even married men seeking second or third wives are looking for the light-skinned. So this is really our time to make a kill. Do you then expect me to agree with my husband’s choice? It will be like sentencing my daughters to a life of hardship.’ She argued.
‘And what makes you think these rich men from Mai-Dalili’s stables will make your daughters happy? You know where I come from, we call these professional matchmakers ‘mai-dalilin-aure.’ Though we’ve never patronised them, our mother didn’t and I hope I’ll never have a reason to, we do know that they specialise in getting rich husbands for daughters of society women. But no one ever told me how happy those unions end up to be or how long they last. So don’t be deceived by their seeming success.’ I warned.
‘You have every right to be sceptical Bint but I have done my home work well and I know that these men are always so happy to have beautiful wives that they do all they can to make them happy. All I want now is to find such matches for my daughters. Then all my prayers will be answered.’ She replied.
‘And do your daughters have a say in the matter. Are they with you on this mai-dalili project?’ I asked.
‘I think so because I’ve already told them that I will make sure they marry into comfortable homes and they seemed happy with my suggestion. That is why none of them is getting serious about any admirer on campus. I’ve told them not to encourage any poor young man to be coming here because he will have no chance with them.’ Sahiba explained.
‘But, with all due respect, that isn’t a good thing to teach your daughters Sahiba. They shouldn’t be taught to judge suitors by their material status.’ I advised.
‘That’s easy for you to say because you have always had wealth and comfort. Allow me, who has lived a life of struggle, to tell you how it feels not to be able to afford all the things other women take for granted. When you came in and I offered you my home-made juices, you thanked me and said you hardly have time to make them.
Do you remember that I told you some of us have no choice but to make them? It’s because I can’t afford to buy those packet juices. Those are for people like you Bint, people for whom such small things are always affordable.’ She protested.
‘But you know we weren’t always like this, you knew us when we were also struggling to make ends meet. Both Tahir and I weren’t always this comfortable. So Almighty Allah blessed our efforts and now we can afford certain things that some people can’t. And the same can happen to your daughters. If you allow them to marry struggling young men and it pleases Allah SWT to make them rich, He will give them a way out of their struggles. So just trust in Almighty Allah, as The Sole Provider and teach them how to be good daughters, wives and mothers.’ I urged.
‘I know where you are coming from Bint, but honestly I don’t want to take the risk. I always see my life as the perfect example of how not to be a dreamer. I married my school teacher husband and he remained a school teacher ever since. Look at the car he drives, it’s 15 years old and he doesn’t even want to think about getting a new one let alone buying me one. But I don’t blame him, he can’t afford to. Yet in recompense for our perpetual poverty The Almighty gave us three beautiful daughters and as far as I’m concerned, they are our gold mine. They will be the source of my happiness and relief from want, I promised myself that.’ Sahiba insisted.
‘Though it seems there is no swaying you, let me still risk advising that you please allow your husband to introduce his friends’ sons to your daughters. If any of them like the match, allow them to marry. As Muslims we know that wealth and affluence are ordained in a person’s life even before his birth. This is why we have so many rags to riches story all over the world. Those destined to be rich will be rich no matter what. Do not insist on your daughters marrying only the rich. And I hope you know that some people become poor after being rich, so what will you do if that happens to one of your daughters’ goldminer?’ I asked.
‘Please don’t wish such evil on my daughters Bint. It isn’t fair.’ Sahiba protested.
‘I am not wishing them any evil, I am your friend right from our school days. But I want you to accept that anything can happen to change a person’s situation, if Allah decrees it. Just teach your daughters good manners and marry them off to virtuous young men. You may find much more happiness than you would get matching them off to dubious rich men.’ I advised, rising up to pick my handbag. Sahiba didn’t even bother to escort me to the car when I walked out.