Steps towards being a more decent step-mum

News on social media some weeks back had it that a father killed his nine-year-old daughter as requested by his new wife. Her reason for asking him to do so was that the girl was a witch and she could not put up with a witch in the same house. Many have described the reason […]

News on social media some weeks back had it that a father killed his nine-year-old daughter as requested by his new wife. Her reason for asking him to do so was that the girl was a witch and she could not put up with a witch in the same house. Many have described the reason as wicked and selfish on the part of the step mum and her husband. The question now is: is it right for a man who decides to keep a child when he’s no longer married to the mother to torment that same child to please his new love? 

Maimuna Umar, 40-year-old business woman says, “We should always remember that no mother would want to see her child go through such ordeal and that is why most women try to endure and be patient in marriage for the sake of her children. Even if the girl were a witch as alleged, a good woman and mother would find means through which she can be delivered. As for men, it’s difficult to find a good man at heart who will stand his ground and protect his child(ren) from a step mum. Why should a man do everything (including the abominable) his wife asks of him just to prove he loves her? Every man or even parent should be wise enough to see their children as top priority before anything or anyone. That is the least we owe them for now.”

Chidinma Okechukwu, 38-year-old fashion designer says, “As a mother, I feel pained when I read or hear of such stories. But on the other hand, men who go to any extent to prove to step mothers of their children that they are everything that matter have themselves to blame for whatever happens to their children. Some women naturally have biased minds and see their step children as threats. It’s best never to give her that glimpse that you married her just to love your kids, it will only put your kids in a terrible situation because she is a woman who should be loved and cherished and not treated as a nanny. 

I would advice that the man takes some steps to encourage good relationship between his children and their step mum; like don’t ever reprimand her in the presence of the kids even if she does something wrong to them, call her aside after that moment. Never fail to look into any report their step mum brings to you concerning their behavior and of course you need to do that with wisdom. Also, don’t give the children more attention than you give to her, it will create an unhealthy rivalry between them which will automatically breed hatred.”

In case you are thinking of maltreating that innocent child please have a rethink, there is a lot to gain should you take them as God’s perfect gifts to you. As women and mothers, we all know that children are top priority for every parent.