Testimony of a bride’s aide

The proposed amendment to Section 29 (4) (b) of the Constitution was, at least outwardly, about the age at which a person is considered matured enough to renounce his or her citizenship. This age was put at 18. Not unreasonably, because anyone below that age is deemed too immature to possess a motor driver’s license, […]

The proposed amendment to Section 29 (4) (b) of the Constitution was, at least outwardly, about the age at which a person is considered matured enough to renounce his or her citizenship. This age was put at 18. Not unreasonably, because anyone below that age is deemed too immature to possess a motor driver’s license, to vote in elections or to join the army. Renouncing one’s citizenship is certainly more serious than any of those? In the days when JAMB produced one massive brochure for all university courses, the University of Nigeria, Nsukka’s prospectus had a statement boldly written at the top of the opening page, “No one below 18 years of age is eligible for admission to any program in the university.” I used to think that learning is for youngsters, but in the wisdom of UNN’s professors, a person below age 18 is not even old enough to learn!
Nigerian women groups and their civil society allies looked like they were lying in wait because they immediately pounced upon the Senate’s somersault and rapidly extended the debate from citizenship to that of marriage age. They demanded an express provision in the Constitution stating that 18 is the age of adulthood and also of marriage in Nigeria.
Inevitably, the Muslim community felt that its traditions, if not its religion, were under attack in this matter. Not being a religious scholar myself, I had to grope around for a starting point in this matter.  I did all my basic religious study at Malam Musa’s roadside school at Kasuwar Birni, Jega. This was supplemented by Anakallahu Malam Sule Na Rini’s teaching at the primary school. I also offered Islamic Studies as a subject at secondary school; it was so easy that I made an A1 in the WASC. Taken together though, these “studies” do not qualify me to wash the wooden slate of a Sheikh, so I must rely on those with genuine knowledge in this matter.
I received at the weekend an e-mailed piece from Murtada Mohamed Gusau, the Imam of a Juma’at Mosque in Okene. He was quite categorical; marrying off a girl at an early age is an Islamic tradition well permitted by the Shari’a. He quoted copiously from both Qur’an and Hadith to buttress his stand. Those who want a swift legal end to early marriage in Nigeria, beware. Unlike the way the National Assembly has been amending the Constitution with the regularity of sunset, a practicing Muslim believes the Qur’an is the law for all time and it is not subject to regular or even irregular amendment. Which should not surprise a practicing Christian; the Bible too is not amenable to human amendment.
In the current debate, I notice that some people talk about “child marriage” while some others talk of “early marriage.” Which is which? Child marriage probably refers to marrying off a girl under 10, which I believe is a rare occurrence in Nigeria today. Early marriage however probably refers to marrying off girls who are somewhere below age 18. Trying to end the marrying off of 13 to 15 year olds is tricky enough; ending the giving out of 16 and 17 year olds is probably impossible at this time.
I do not have the Imam’s knowledge of Shari’a but I sure have a working knowledge of the actual marriage traditions in Hausaland, having gone to primary school in my own village more than four decades ago. Maybe Jega in the 1970s was more semi-urban than rural, but the predominant culture with respect to marriage was the rural Hausa Muslim one. I was very familiar with that because as primary school kids around the ages of 8 to 11, we played an important role whenever an amarya [bride] was being taken to the ango’s [groom] house. We were the ones who did the dabe, that is, constructed the floor of the bride’s room with broken pieces of clay pots, cowry shells and mud. We also helped with the jere, decorating the bride’s room with brass pots, dishes and calabashes. We were a conspicuous part of the wedding procession, and we were the ones that sat with the bride in her early days in order to relieve her home sickness.
I did this for scores of amare and I can firmly state that 40 years ago, all the brides that I escorted to their groom’s houses were much older than we were as late primary school kids. I cannot know for certain what their ages were, but I guess they were anywhere between 14 and 16. I will not state my evidence for this guesstimate. We certainly looked up to them as elder sisters. In all cases they lived up to that role because they told us what to do, corrected our mistakes, settled our quarrels and sent us on errands. They all knew how to cook and they all knew the intricate formula for sharing out food in a large family compound, including who must be served his food alone and who could be grouped together to eat in a common bowl.
Now, as to the key but taboo subject of their sex lives I couldn’t know very much, but it looked like they coped fairly well. On one occasion I eavesdropped as our grandmothers Hajia Allami and Hajia Umma were adjudicating in a marital dispute. From the little I overheard, the bride was not playing ball, clearly because she was so young that she thought sex was an evil thing, like all children are taught.
Through the Sharia’s position on early marriage as outlined by Imam Murtada, I thought I saw light in the tunnel in the views of a constitutional lawyer from Kano. He pointed out that the essentials of Muslim marriage are dowry, two witnesses and a waliy who will give out the bride. This is to say that while the Shari’a permitted early marriage, perhaps even child marriage, it did not make it mandatory. The Shari’a prescribed no minimum age for marriage but it did not prescribe a maximum age either. In that case, it is the Muslim community’s traditions as dictated by their socio-economic environment and their own personal choices that will set the minimum age for marriage.
It is not surprising therefore that the average marriage age in Hausaland has risen steadily in the last four decades with the relentless advance of Western education and urbanisation. When we finished primary school, our female classmates that did not proceed to secondary school got married soon afterwards. They must be around ages 12 to 14 then. However, the ones that went on to secondary school did not marry until at least five years later, when they graduated. In those days, the problem of girls being withdrawn from school in order to be given out in marriage was rather common. The Gwandu Native Authority however cracked down on offending parents and soon stamped it out. The old Native Authority was very effective in such matters, unlike the contract-centered local government councils of today.
These days, many urban and semi-urban families in Northern Nigeria think a girl is not ripe for marriage until she has gone some way into tertiary education, i.e. 18 to 20 years. There are many families these days that tell a suitor to “wait until she graduates” or even, “wait until she finishes her NYSC.” So, while I personally wish that no girl under 18 is given out in marriage, I am realistic enough to know that this problem will only be solved in an evolutionary manner, not with a revolutionary banging of the Senate President’s gavel. If only we can ensure that every child acquires basic education, early marriage will be a thing of the past.