The hidden vitiator

The enriching history that comes with the revelation of most verses is disclosed during this annual Qur’anic exegesis. And today’s chapter is always my yearly favourite. Surah Yusuf contains all of life’s lessons about envy, treachery, patience, perseverance and forgiveness. I just never get tired of hearing the story of Prophet Yusuf AS and his […]

The enriching history that comes with the revelation of most verses is disclosed during this annual Qur’anic exegesis. And today’s chapter is always my yearly favourite. Surah Yusuf contains all of life’s lessons about envy, treachery, patience, perseverance and forgiveness. I just never get tired of hearing the story of Prophet Yusuf AS and his legendary good looks, his envious brothers and his boundless faith and forgiveness.’  I enthused as I drove out of the parking lot of the mosque.
‘It’s easier for you to say Bint. I had the worst tafsir session of my life today, so I am in no position to rhapsodise about it or the surah in question.’ Asabe said drily.
‘The worst tafsir session, why?’ I asked, momentarily taking my eyes off the road to look at my friend on the passenger seat. ‘Because one lady managed to make me so miserable I had to leave the mosque when I couldn’t tolerate her any longer.’ She replied.
‘Really?’ Maryam quipped from the back seat ‘I didn’t notice you fighting with anyone. And from where I sat, I could see you clearly.’ She added.
‘No I wish I was. In truth I was running away from suffocation. One woman who sat next to me was smelling so badly I had to run for dear life. At first I thought I could ignore it but I realized that I was so disturbed by her body odour that I couldn’t even hear what the Sheikh was saying. In the end I decided to just walk outside and stay at the veranda, hoping I’ll be able to hear well from there but I couldn’t hear clearly.’ Asabe explained.
‘But you could have changed your seat.’ I suggested. ‘Yes, but I also risk sitting next to someone who might smell as badly as that first woman. You know there are some women who believe, erroneously, that once it’s Ramadan they must not use deodorants or anything perfumed because they will inhale it and it will break their fast. I believe my neighbor at the mosque today is one of those. But she does need to do something about her condition, if only she knows.’ Asabe insisted.
‘Or maybe she doesn’t use it at all. You know there is a hadith of Rasulillah SAW that says any woman who perfumes herself and goes to an assembly where men are, in order to attract them, is an adultress. Now some women misinterpret this hadith by refraining from using anything that smells nice at all for fear that they will fall into this category while the truth is deodorants and body sprays are not really perfumes. They only keep you fresh but do not smell so strongly as to attract others. If only there is a way to enlighten such women to stop torturing themselves and others.’ Maryam lamented.
‘And there she is!’ Asabe exclaimed, pointing a finger at a woman walking on foot by the road side. Her long hijab seems to have seen better days. ‘This is the woman who prevented me from hearing today’s tafsir. I can’t believe anyone can smell so badly and not be aware of it.‘ She added.
‘Well congrats Asabe’ I said sarcastically, ‘you have successfully managed to break all our three fasts in the blink of an eye.’
‘What do you mean by that?’ Asabe asked, confused.
‘It means you have just engaged in backbiting by pointing at that woman and accusing her of being smelly; an act which Rasulillah SAW said vitiates both fasting and ablution.’ I explained.
‘But what I said is true, the woman is smelling.’ Asabe insisted.
‘Yes, it’s because what you said is true that you have backbitten her.
If you had said what isn’t true it would have been slander. Because when the Companions RA asked Rasulillah SAW what backbiting was, he answered ‘It is to say about your brother what will displease him if he were to hear it.’ And when someone asked ‘What if my brother is as I said’ and He SAW answered ‘If he is as you said, you have backbitten him and if he isn’t, then you have slandered him.’ So you see where your words belong? And the unfortunate fact is that those of us who listen to you have equally shared in your sin. Luckily we didn’t ask or encourage you to say more, we would all have ended up with useless hunger because our fasts would have been broken spiritually.’ I asserted.
‘But Bint what the ulama always say is that fasting is broken by the intake of food, water or any other liquid and by sexual intercourse.
How can you claim that merely talking bad about others can break our fast? I think this is taking jurisprudence too far.’ Maryam protested from the back seat.
‘That’s precisely the point.’ I replied Maryam ‘this is not jurisprudence, which concerns itself only with the physical aspect of worship. This is the spiritual aspect of worship. In the Holy Qur’an Almighty Allah described backbiting as eating the flesh of a fellow human being. In Suratul Hujurat He SWT said ‘O believers avoid most of suspicion for in some cases suspicion is a sin. Do not spy on one another, do not backbite one another. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Surely you would loathe it…’ Verse 12.
 And as proof of that, there is the story of the two women who sent word to Rasulillah SAW asking permission to break their fast due to exhaustion, he sent a bowl to them and asked them to throw up what they had been feeding on all day. Because they had spent most of their fasting hours backbiting others, they threw up fresh flesh with blood into the bowl sent by the Messenger of Allah. When it was brought to him, he said of them ‘They fasted on what is lawful to them (food and drink) and broke their fast on what is unlawful to them (other people’s reputation and honour).’ I quoted.
‘But why don’t the scholars ever emphasise this spiritual aspect of fasting?’ Asabe asked in anger. ‘God knows I’ve always talked freely and about everything when I’m fasting because I had no idea there is anything wrong with that.’ She lamented.
‘Well I’ve always known backbiting was bad, I just didn’t know it was bad enough to break a fast.’ Maryam conceded.
‘It is, my sisters, because an authentic Hadith of the Prophet SAW says ‘Backbiting vitiates fasting and ablution.’ Unfortunately I’ve often seen people who will claim that they have their ablution intact for several hours so they keep praying with it. Meanwhile in between they have done nothing but malign an endless number of people. The ablution had long since been broken by backbiting. It is the hidden vitiator. I think we should make a special point of enlightening people on this. Let’s make leaflets and share at gatherings like the tafsir session, so we can create awareness on the dangers of backbiting and how it makes nonsense of our diligent acts of worship.’
I recommended, turning towards the bend that leads to Maryam’s house.
‘Yes, it’s a good idea to raise this awareness. But what if one runs into a problem like the lady at the tafsir? Surely one can’t help backbiting at such times.’ Asabe defended.
‘According to the great Islamic sage Imam Al-Ghazali two things are the primary causes of backbiting. Anger and envy. On one hand someone got you angry either by acts of commission or omission and you just have to tell others. On the other hand, you are envious of someone and you feel like criticising them in order to let off steam or to reduce their popularity in other people’s eyes. So, to Imam Al-Ghazali, if you can control your anger or envy you can really control the urge to backbite.’ I declared.
‘We will try, though it just doesn’t sound easy.’ Maryam observed, picking up her bag to exit the car. Back on the road once more, Asabe said to me:
‘She’s right it doesn’t sound easy. And suddenly you’ve left me feeling guilty about back-biting the lady from the mosque, though I can’t help feeling she caused it on herself.’ Asabe remarked.
‘Maybe she did but since you don’t know the circumstances of her life, you can’t be sure she caused it on herself. To me she looked very poor indeed. It’s very possible she doesn’t even have easy access to the water with which to take regular baths. You can help her by coming to the tafsir tomorrow with some toilet soaps, some laundry soap, some deodorant spray or roll on and maybe a little money. Donate these to her and maybe you will take a step towards ending that body odour that disturbed you so much.’ I replied.
‘Ok, I will Bint. inshaAllah I will buy those and look for her at the mosque tomorrow.’ She assured me.