The home front or your career
Most times most people are faced with the choice of career or the home. This is mostly difficult for the women folk who have to deal with the home front and career at the same time. When the question was put to some women and the responses varied. “I have been confronted with this question […]
Most times most people are faced with the choice of career or the home. This is mostly difficult for the women folk who have to deal with the home front and career at the same time. When the question was put to some women and the responses varied.
“I have been confronted with this question before by my husband before marriage. He said he wanted my opinion on what my choice would be if I had to choose between my work and the home. I will tell you what I told him exactly. Both are very, very important but when it comes to choice I will go for the home if I have kids and if there are no kids I will surely go for my career. He was happy with my response but I told him afterwards that he would have to put up something tangible for me before I quit my career for whatever egoistic satisfaction he tends to achieve. Abi you don’t expect me to just quit my job and come and sit at home. It’s not economically wise,” says Ijeoma Ifeanyi, a civil servant.
“If such a situation arises as Muslims do we have a choice? We would have to choose our homes no matter the situation. But I will remind him that asking me to go back home he should be sure that he can cope with all the responsibilities that would arise from such a decision. For me I feel there is sense in cooperation in the home. It isn’t all the time that the head of the family will be capable of handling all the responsibilities in the home. Once in a while or even most times the woman augments the income of the husband. So it is not totally wise for the woman to be totally dependent of the man. The home is equally important but it runs well if the funds are there. For me if the woman’s career will go a long way in helping them why not?” says Jamila Hussaini, a caterer.
Some women also expressed fear over the inevitable in life death. “This question shouldn’t be coming up in the first place. What happens if the inevitable happens? If the woman isn’t working and depends her whole life and that of the kids on her husband, tell me what then happens if the man dies. Where does she start from? Most men just feel threatened when they have a career wife forgetting that it pays them for her to be a career woman than to be solely dependent on him. As for us (women) we just have to learn to balance our home and career. None must suffer at the expense of the other. The home front is equally as important as our career we must not forget that,” says Obaigeli Chukwudi Charles, a banker.
“I always tell any woman that cares to listen that her independence goes a long way in ensuring that the home is stable. Whatever the case might if I am given both options I will plead with my husband because as we know it there is no way it can work out in this present day Nigeria where its only one person that is working. The burden will be too much for the person. For me I will stick with my career no matter what. If there are no kids involved it make the case easier, career it is!” says Oyiza Hauwa Bello, a business woman.
“If you ask me I will advise the woman has something doing as long as it will not affect the home. The more she sits at home out of frustration and burden the house will be unbearable. The best thing for both partners is to sit and work out something amicable for the good of the family. The woman on the other hand should not allow her job have the better part of her so that the family does not suffer. Women should be given a little independence in terms of also earning a living for herself, that way she would even learn to appreciate the efforts of the husband.” says Ali Musa, civil servant.
Unfortunately in today’s society the lines of career and family and what is important get blurred together. Many people believe that to provide well for their family that they must make a lot of money. This becomes the focus of their lives, so much so, that they will sacrifice everything, including the family, for that fame or fortune. What they have lost sight of is that the one thing they were working for is the one thing they just lost in the process. Do not make this mistake. Talk with your spouse, picture how you want your family life to be, and then make the career fit with that vision. If your current career cannot fit with your vision, it is high-powered, high-stress, requires travel etc. It is advisable you change careers you and your family will be happier in the end.