The latest theatre of the absurd

Charles:  I beg, don’t kill me with anxiety. Who and who are sucking the nation’s blood? I guess you’re poised to poke fun at the reckless and shameful manner some of our governors, ministers, legislators, commissioners, council chairmen, numerous special advisers and assistants have  unleashed their looting carnival on the nation. This is no longer […]

Charles:  I beg, don’t kill me with anxiety. Who and who are sucking the nation’s blood? I guess you’re poised to poke fun at the reckless and shameful manner some of our governors, ministers, legislators, commissioners, council chairmen, numerous special advisers and assistants have  unleashed their looting carnival on the nation. This is no longer news.

Nasdi: You got it wrong! You’re too pre-emptive! No sane person would have continued to berate the tragic dimension looting has assumed in this country if it were to be restricted to those in charge of our nation’s politics. But the unfolding revelation in the banking sector is enough to make one lose hope in the country. No apology to extra-optimists of this nation!

Charles: Ah! Ah! Ah! You mean the wishy-washy thing the apex bank has exposed or is exposing? I agree with you we’re a nation run by thieves.

Nasdi: No, no, no. Don’t over-react. No name-calling, please. It’s uncalled for, I beg.

Charles: Uncalled for? Calling a spade a spade? Why are you afraid? Aren’t we referring to those thief executives of banks and their numerous partners in parasitism?

Nasdi: No, I’m not afraid in the least. You know me very well. I’m only being courteous in this matter though I know how grievous those people’s crime is. For now, let’s be careful.

Charles: You’re truly being courteous. I’m sure you’re afraid of being sued for slander. But mind you, anyone who refuses to hit the nail on the head, especially when such a sensitive issue is involved, is likely to be seen as the number one enemy of the masses.

Nasdi: Na you sabi am.  

Charles: Okay. Can we be a bit subtle by referring to them as fraudsters for the barefaced manner they’ve run their respective banks?

Nasidi: I doubt if you really understand the issue at all.

Charles: A whole me? Isn’t it about the sack of the five bank chief executives by the Central Bank for glorifying misnomer in the sector, I mean for violating due process in granting ‘non-performing’ loans to most of the super business moguls in the country?  Who could have committed such a gross misconduct other than fraudsters, professional ones?

Nasdi: I wouldn’t say you’re wrong. But I think we should give kudos to the CBN boss at least for exposing such a shoddy deal.

Charles: Look at you. Some individuals are already grumbling that the man is promoting an ethnic agenda. They’re not convinced that the rule of law is on course. All they want is business-as-usual. Poor men!

Nasdi: So, we still have people who could be so awkward in their reasoning?

Charles: Don’t mind them. Instead of blaming the mother-hen for not shielding the chicks, they’re blaming the hawk for exercising its devouring capability.

Nasdi: I embrace your linguistic domestication.

Charles: I just don’t know why some people could just ascribe ethnicity to such a vital issue. They seem not to understand the consequence of such glorified fraud on the nation’s economy. It doesn’t bother them that when banks become distressed, the masses that don’t have access to looting would lose their hard-earned money; businesses would collapse and many families would become poorer.

Nasdi:  Here is an absurdity in the whole drama. Some of those bank executives and the so-called debtors have already developed cold feet as they’re being drawn in by the EFCC dragnet. I could see one of them slum in the dock.  They only fall sick when asked to come and give account of their deals.

Charles: I pray the anti-corruption agency deem it fit to expand its custody from where, if the legal action threatened by the CBN boss is anything to go by, those bank executives and debtors proven guilty would end up in prison.

Nasdi: Amen! Don’t forget that some of those said to be heavily indebted to the banks in question are company chief executives who have lately emerged either as president or chairman of this and that.

Charles: That is the tragedy of the whole thing. What an absurdity!

Nasdi: Another absurdity is here. Some of the banks in question, despite their failing condition, were granted facilities by some officials of the apex bank. We’re yet to see those officials’ head roll.

Charles: I guess you want to assume those CBN officials to be part of the non-performing loan debtors. Leave that for their boss. He’s taking note of that. I can assure you that he’s a professional with a no-sacred-cow principle.

Nasdi: Well, as the wind continues to blow, let’s hope that we’ll see much more of the fowl’s rump.