THREE LUCKY DUDES

Dr Goodluck Ebele Jonathan calmly strode into the centre of Nigeria’s politics in 2007, the general assumption has always been that to be successful in Nigerian politics, you need only one dominant quality: You need to be bad. Bad here defined as simply being mean in every conceivable way: treacherous, unreliable, cold-blooded, ruthless, roguish, unscrupulous […]

Dr Goodluck Ebele Jonathan calmly strode into the centre of Nigeria’s politics in 2007, the general assumption has always been that to be successful in Nigerian politics, you need only one dominant quality: You need to be bad. Bad here defined as simply being mean in every conceivable way: treacherous, unreliable, cold-blooded, ruthless, roguish, unscrupulous and in some cases, downright evil-minded.

Okay, let’s admit it; Yar’adua and Jonathan weren’t the first set of er, unbad (as distinct from good) guys to be president and vice president over and above more deserving, that is to say more aggressive, competitors; certainly the aging pair of former President Shehu Shagari and his—wont you believe it—Architect deputy, Alex Ekwueme, fit that description perfectly. And truth be told, Balewa and Zik (1960-’66) weren’t exactly a bad pair either; but things have changed for the worse in the country that it has become impossible for Nigerians to think of change or new leadership without cringing. Over the years every time a new leadership emerges, along comes a new set of Wahala for everybody but the new comers. Would another mild pair of Jonathan and Sambo be any different?

Viewed from this admittedly pessimistic but also justifiable prism, it would be stupid to get excited just because Aso Rock and Aguda House received new tenants. Speaking of tenants, the new occupants better watch out lest they get carried away; and I mean that both literally and literarily. They should be particularly wary of their spouses; women are notorious for setting up permanent structures where a tent would suffice.

As usual, there is always a silver lining even amidst the darkest of clouds. In this instant, Nigerians should take comfort that despite being continuously battered and bruised by greed and corruption, the democracy that everybody talks about but few believe in, seemed determined to survive. That every vacuum is now effectively filled without a shot being fired is a strong testimony to the resilience of the ‘other’ Nigerian factor, as opposed to the Nigerian factor we are more familiar with.

Right, now that all the pieces are in place, it is not out of place to indulge in the useless pastime of advising our leaders; useless because nobody listens, pastime because it gives the adviser something to do. So, what can President Jonathan realistically accomplish in less than a year? Very little; but then again, there is the example set by the Late General Murtala Muhammed whose achievements in seven months are still the point of reference for both civilian and military regimes before and after him. Scholars of Government say that the Nigerian Presidency is the most powerful in the democratized world; that the Nigerian president can do just about anything he or she desires. This power is guaranteed not only by the system, but by the susceptibility of the operators of the system to corruption.  For Jonathan, this is as much an opportunity as it is a challenge. He could exploit the weaknesses of the system for good or for bad.

Two weeks ago when he was sworn in, this column mentioned that among the things that should worry President Jonathan is the intensity of the scrutiny he must face at home and abroad. I wonder if Mr President is aware that some Nigerians are already connecting the dots, as it were.  For instance at the last Federation Account Allocation Committee (FAAC) meeting which ended  unsuccessfully, the Minister of State for Finance, Mr Remi Babalola, said something very strange. After dancing around in circles, he came up with this very funny excuse: “It is not that there is no money to share; but we need the president’s permission to do so…”. Really? Not since the days when former Governor of Lagos State, Asiwaju Bola Tinubu, tangoed with former President Obasanjo over the state’s local council allocations did we hear anything so incomprehensible.

To most of us without a background in financial matters, what Babalola’s statement meant was that the new

president was beginning to flex his muscles. If that were so, then Mr Jonathan was sending a very dangerous signal; you may play around with privileges, but when it comes to statutory matters, things can get real ugly real quick. That that shenanigan happened while the president and governors were testing each others’ will over who would be vice president, makes this conjecture even more plausible.

Then, there is the curious matter of the sacking of Mr Shehu Ladan, the erstwhile Group Managing Director of the NNPC who was embarrassed out of office after only 41 days. Politically, professionally and socially, Ladan is not a personality who generates any considerable amount of interest; but the manner of his sack rankles with those with conscience. As one very knowledgeable technocrat pointed out, “when you sack somebody from office you do so with decorum; you can even give him the option to resign rather than disgrace him in that manner. In the case of Ladan, after sacking him, the government ordered immediate audit of the NNPC accounts, thereby creating the impression that he had done something wrong. What a country”.

Yeah, what a country indeed. Hitherto, nobody cared enough about us to tell us what crime Shehu Ladan had committed, as if Nigerians are not stakeholders in the organization he headed. Anyway, I made my enquiries and this is what I learned. That the Minister of Petroleum, the photogenic Deziani Allison-Maduekwe, simply walked into the president’s office and told him that she could not work with Ladan; and just like that the man was sacked. For the sake of President Jonathan, I hope this is not true. But then if this is not true, what is the truth?

As for Vice President Mohammed Namadi Sambo, well , the man is still a mystery to a lot of people. While in Kaduna, he was engaged in a perpetual cat-and-mouse game with his predecessor and political mentor, Senator Ahmed Mohammed Makarfi. Ego is probably at the center of their disagreement, a situation that was compounded by the fact that from fighting over who controls the politics of Kaduna state, they found themselves competing for the position of vice president. Having triumphed, Sambo must not allow himself to be distracted by all that. As vice president, he has a duty to shore up the necessary support for the president where he has the leverage to do so. Their partnership seems like a workable team; whereas the president does not come across as overbearing, Sambo doesn’t seem like the over-ambitious type; if anything, he would probably be so laid-back that the president might have to work extra hard to pull him out. That is something he must avoid also; the constituency he represents would like to see him representing them in areas that matter to them. I heard the president at the swearing in of Sambo making promises about keeping promises; honestly he needs not bother.

All we ask from him and his deputy is a solid improvement in our security situation; and a free and fair elections.  If they can achieve that in one year, we’ll pardon whatever errors they might fall into.

Finally, let me join millions to congratulate the people of Kaduna state; those of us who live in Kaduna but reside elsewhere were given a very frightening picture that if somebody from southern Kaduna becomes governor, the world would come to an end. Fortunately, we misunderstood the message; we didn’t know that those people were referring their own little world of opportunism. Governor Yakowa’s agenda? Let him maintain and improve on the security situation in the state. His critics say he can’t, let him prove them wrong; otherwise the consequences are better imagined. God forbid.