When your wife is a bad cook

Men whose wives do not know how to cook generally or cook certain  meals either choose to bottle their anger and eat whatever their wives  prepare for them without  telling them their cooking so as not to offend them, or choose to bicker or quarrel and badmouth their wives to other people, and also eat […]

Men whose wives do not know how to cook generally or cook certain  meals either choose to bottle their anger and eat whatever their wives  prepare for them without  telling them their cooking so as not to offend them, or choose to bicker or quarrel and badmouth their wives to other people, and also eat out frequently  with friends, family or at eateries and restaurants.
Suffice to say that bad cooking makes some men very unhappy in their homes and even ashamed especially when they have visitors. Ironically there are some men who enjoy their wives’ meal  even those wives who by other people’s judgment cook badly. Such men leave their neighbours, friends and relatives wondering how they swallow such meals.
What really then should a man do if his wife cooks badly?
Jibril  Aminu, an estate agent said the best thing to do is to stop eating the woman’s food. “When she sees you are not pleased with her cooking, she will be compelled to learn or start cooking properly even if it means going to meet her mother from time to time to learn. When she still doesn’t learn, return her to her parents, you shouldn’t live all your life in bondage. You cannot continue to eat bad food or poison in the name of marriage.  A good wife should also know how to cook,” he said.
Amos Magaji, a business man advises enrolling the woman in a catering school or bringing in a relation who knows how to cook to teach her.
He said another way is for the man to engage his wife in a sort of competition. He cited the case of man who was able to improve his wife’s cooking through that.  “Sometimes he will tell his wife let us cook rice today and see whose own tastes better. Both of them will then start cooking at the end when the wife tasted his, she started noticing the difference and gradually started cooking well.”
Magaji also said when a man’s wife doesn’t know how to cook it should be kept private and ironed out within the family. He cautioned men against bad mouthing their wives because they don’t know how to cook.
Hajiya Muibat , a housewife on her part said the husband should bring in people who know how to cook to teach his wife how to cook, “ He can also take her to a catering school and to his friends’ houses so that she can learn from their wives. If it is traditional food, she doesn’t know how to cook you can also call an elderly women to teach her, “ she advised.
Malik  Abubakar, a journalist on his part advised such husbands to be patient and calmly urge their wives to learn how to cook. He also advised women to take good cooking seriously or make efforts to learn once their husbands express displeasure as there wouldn’t be peace in the home if they do otherwise.  He said bad cooking is a relationship and marriage breaker and some women have been divorced by their husbands because of it, adding that on no account should a woman get angry when her husbands complains.
Olayemi Awesu, a mother and civil servant said: “Just sit her down and discuss the issue. What may not be tasty to you could be very tasty to another man. For instance there are some men who like a lot of salt or pepper in their food, and maybe their wives were brought up in homes where they use little salt or pepper, if you notice her food is having no salt or pepper just simply tell her to add more and if it is the other way with your wife’s cooking having too much salt, pepper or spice ask her to reduce it to your taste instead of going outside to complain to other people about her cooking. It is not good to do that.  
“By so doing you open a window for trouble in your home. Some especially your mother and sisters may mock her or even take advantage to start cooking for you.if you want to hire someone to teach her make sure you get somebody that is not too familiar with both of you, an aunty or friend’s wife for instance will tell the story to her children’s children about how your wife doesn’t know how to cook and she had to teach her to save the marriage. Don’t also make your wife depressed by not eating her food or eating somewhere else.”
Another respondent who simply gave her name as Henrietta  said if a man’s wife doesn’t know how to cook her husband should teach her or do the cooking himself. It is not only the wife that can cook the family’s meals.
She faulted men who insult their wives in front of  guests because of their cooking. “Look for a good way to tell her she is not cooking to your taste or learn how to cook yourself. Marriage is not all about a woman’s cooking”
Judith Achakpa, a student said the man should politely let his wife know her cooking is not good. “Every woman wants to keep her home and she will listen to you and learn, the man should not start eating out and abusing his wife as a result of that because that can cause problems for the marriage.”
Edith Okwute, a civil servant said it is a not big deal that a man’s wife cannot cook well because the man can easily teach her or help her learn.
 “There are many women who left their parents home without knowing how to cook but learnt in their husband’s home. The man can teach her by joining her in the kitchen whenever she is cooking. He could taste the soup on the pot for instance and say ‘Darling is there enough salt in this soup at all? Please add’ and she will do so. With time she will begin to get it right. It is not only a woman’s mother who can teach her to cook.”
She said some men as bachelors learnt how to cook well and by the time they marry, they can easily find fault with their wives’ cooking but all they need do is to teach their wives instead of waiting for them to cook and serve them tasteless food.
On men who enjoy their wives’ meals even when every other person knows they don’t cook well,  many of the respondents  said so long as the husband enjoys the meal it is ok because he is the priority while some said every husband should make efforts to assess people’s reactions to their wives cooking and encourage her to improve as love does not also blind the taste buds.