Who should be a married woman’s next of kin?

Suffice to say that a man or husband is usually viewed as the head of the family and his wife and children as his  dependents. As such he has more liberty, and choosing a next of kin is straight forward for him.  However, while a woman can also make her choice of next of kin, […]

Suffice to say that a man or husband is usually viewed as the head of the family and his wife and children as his  dependents. As such he has more liberty, and choosing a next of kin is straight forward for him.  
However, while a woman can also make her choice of next of kin, she is limited in some families and situations because she does not have the man and her children as dependents.
Even though a married woman might not be the head of the family, she may have some property that needs to be shared after her death.  So should she make her child or her husband the next of kin? Or make her husband the next of kin with the understanding that the wealth belongs to the children and he is only inheriting it on behalf of the children in order to take care of them. Should it be her living parents, her brothers or other relatives?
The Home Front sought out to find out.
Hajiya Rabiat said she uses her child as her next of kin and not her husband, adding that  before she got married she was using her brother as her next of kin.
She said many African men cannot be trusted with the issue of next of kin because they can neglect the children and use the money or property the woman left behind to marry new wives or to take care of the other wives and their children.
She said in worse cases, a man who is no longer interested in his wife and knows she has used him as her next of kin could kill her to inherit her property and use the wealth for his new found women.
Sunday Agbo on his part said he will advocate that a woman uses her child as the next of kin but where there is no child she should use her husband. “The same thing should apply to a man. He should use his child as next of kin and when there is no child he should use his wife,” he said.
Agbo said that these days  it is common to see women using their relatives as their next of kin and not their husbands especially when they are yet to have grown up children. He said the women often say that their parents suffered to educate and raise them, and they became what they are through their parents so their blood relatives should enjoy the fruits of their labour.
According to him, “They also say their blood relatives such as their brothers will be in a better position to take care of their (the women’s ) children  and not their husbands who could marry other women after their death or use the money  to cater for their concubines and wives who they may not be aware of before death.
He advised people both male and female alike to always remember to change the next of kin in their documents as the time goes on or when they have other people who could be more suitable.
He cited cases of  crises and shock in families where the husbands fought with their late wife’s brothers because the women forgot to change their documents after marriage , and children who fought their uncles or other relatives and friends because their fathers forgot to change their documentation after having them and when they were grown up.
Juliana Samson a student said she uses her brother as her next of kin and will  change it to her first child when she gets married and starts having children.
Mrs Mosun Godwin said she uses her husband as her next of kin, because he is her better half.  “Because we are married, we are one, and that makes him closer to me than any other relative. Where there is love and trust a couple should use each other as next of kin and God forbid if something bad happens one of them can care for the children from there. They should only change it to the children when they become grown up,” she explains.
Mr Mike Omorodion said if a married woman has children she should use her first child as next of kin but when she doesn’t have a child, she should used her brother, adding “She should use someone she trusts from her own family. Most times a man uses his children and not his wife as next of kin so there is no need for the woman to use her husband as next of kin.”
Sadia Hussein, a civil servant said she puts her husband’s name as next of kin in any documents making such provisions because he is the closest person to her who can help her in time of need and also take care of the children.
The founder of the Al-Mustoffiyya Islamic Society of Nigeria, Ustaz Maisuna M. Yahaya said the best is for the wife to make her husband the next of kin since they are expected to be the closest to each other.
He also said where the husband is not available, then the wife can make any of her children her next of kin.
Pastor Chris Okpalefe of the Redeemed Christian Church of God (RCCG) Karu, Abuja said a married woman should use her husband as next of kin.
He said, “She should use her husband because her desire shall be towards her husband according to the Bible.”