Why marriages among Hausa people often fail

Hausa being the largest and one of the most structured languages in Africa is threatened with foreign interventions (often west) to the extent that some of its valuable ethics, norms and values are no longer honored and preserved. In the olden days, a girl usually got married at 13 or 14 years, or at most 16-18 […]

Hausa being the largest and one of the most structured languages in Africa is threatened with foreign interventions (often west) to the extent that some of its valuable ethics, norms and values are no longer honored and preserved.
 In the olden days, a girl usually got married at 13 or 14 years, or at most 16-18 years. But with the gradual coming in of the Arabs who brought Islam, the culture then changed from tribal to an Islamic one.  
Later in the 20th century, after the fall of the Sokoto Caliphate in 1906, the English culture started to flourish. Conventional schools were built to train both males and females making it a strong factor in the change process in the Hausa marriage tradition. Because, as at then, what is known nowadays as nursery and primary school was called elementary school with about 9 years duration before completion.
This is also in addition to the fact that a child must be at least 10 years of age before enrollment. Thus female Hausa ladies age of marriage changed from the average of 15 years then to about 20 years  in the 1970s to 90s.   
After the 1990s, the tradition of marriage age of both Hausa men and women have been changed and accepted (unwillingly) to about 30 and 25 years respectively. With the popular acceptance of tertiary education for both male and female, the ages changed to about plus five years for both male and female respectively.
In my opinion, Hausa marriage is struggling between its own cultural and religious values with  western and social interventions.
Secondly, social and economic development is also a factor  with Hausa people increasingly falling into the elites circle of Nigeria thereby  killing our marriages. Elitism carries with it easy acceptance and incorporation of  foreign culture which is helping to kill marriages.
Another factor is the use of religion in achieving our desires. Although Islam allows  polygamy, it is not being utilized efficiently in Hausa land and societies.
This is because of either arrogance or ignorance. A person with no job or a job that can support only one wife, will end up having two wives and 20 children. I support polygamy, because it is allowed by Allah The Most High. But Allah said in Q4 v 3 that marry women of your desires up to 4  if you can. You must establish  justice between  them.
Also Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W.S) said “oh you youths, who ever among you can support a wife let him get married”  
Lastly, use of unlawful means and methods before the marriage. In Islam, a person is not allowed to even talk to a girl without her father’s consent and approval. Nowadays, Hausa dating and courtship is going on in social medias and market place. Also, lack of good understanding is another factor. Also difference in showing caring and love to partner after marriage.
   Finally, Hausa marriage has its beauties that we cherish and love forever. And the problems with our marriages failure can be remedied by going back to our Islamic and cultural norms, values and system.
Jari, president, Cultural and Social Re-orientation Front, writes from Katsina.