Would you disclose your salary to your spouse?

Marriage is undeniably important and for it to be successful, spouses must be compatible and have mutual understanding. In order to maintain a perfect relationship in any marriage, both spouses must learn to do away with secrets. Nevertheless, some people believe that nothing should be kept a secret from your spouse while others claim that […]

Marriage is undeniably important and for it to be successful, spouses must be compatible and have mutual understanding. In order to maintain a perfect relationship in any marriage, both spouses must learn to do away with secrets. Nevertheless, some people believe that nothing should be kept a secret from your spouse while others claim that not everything should be known by your spouse for the sake of peace. The following are views of some people.
Simi Benson, a public servant, says personally he sees no reason why he shouldn’t disclose his salary to his wife. “I will tell her because I am an open-minded person and there is no need to hide it from her. However, if my wife happens to be someone secretive and doesn’t open up to me, then I definitely wouldn’t tell her.”
25- year-old Ruth Yusuf (not real name), says it is okay to let your spouse know what you are earning. She went on to say that when two people are married, they have become one, so why hide such things from each other? “I don’t have a problem with that because my husband and I took an oath on our wedding day to be faithful and honest to each other. I am very comfortable sharing so many personal things with my spouse. It gives me peace of mind knowing fully that I have no secrets.”
32-year-old lawyer called Hadizah Usman, says that her husband is the closest person she has so automatically he has the right to know her salary. She urged women to learn how to share things with their spouses as it creates a very strong bond between the spouses. “My husband knows my salary, in fact he knows the exact date I receive my salary and whenever I am paid an upfront or extra allowance I always tell him as well. When I have money he knows likewise if I am broke, he is the first person I tell. I share my happiness and sorrow with my husband because he is my best friend.”
52-year-old businesswoman, Patricia Ufuoma says that the bedrock of every successful marriage is trust, so secrets shouldn’t be kept by both partners. “The moment you get married, both of you become one, thereby sharing everything together both physical and emotional things. I strongly believe that if there is great understanding, both partner’s salaries will not be a problem, even if the woman earns more. That is why I advise young couples to pray and avoid keeping secrets because no matter how small the secret, when it is exposed it could lead to greater issues.”
Uche Okoro, 42, a marriage counsellor said, “Every marriage that starts with secrets will eventually lead to problems. If there is an understanding between both partners, then the salary should not be a problem. Trust is one major characteristic that can’t be overlooked in any relationship or marriage, that is why I advise that before anyone gets into marriage they should know each other very well and build on trust in their relationship because when there is trust there is love.”
In most cases, people believe that your spouse should be your best friend, companion and confidant. Also, spouses should know everything about each other, as it brings about happiness and trust. On the other hand, some people argue that your spouse doesn’t have to know everything, needing privacy even in marriage.
Adaobi Okoye, 22-year-old undergraduate says though she is not married, she wouldn’t disclose her salary to her husband. “Men in general, especially in Africa have this domineering attitude and would want to control you. I don’t think I will disclose how much I am paid to my husband I don’t want a situation where he would look at me when it comes to financial responsibility. There are also men who may feel inferior when they find out about your salary, it is that moment that they would imagine you are not respectful.”
Babagana Suleiman, a banker, says the least he would do is to let his wife know the amount he is earning. Women are generally not trustworthy for so many reasons. “I like to keep a lot of things from my wife because if I let her know my salary I wouldn’t have peace of mind as she would make me do things that are beyond my earnings. My wife is the type that likes shopping, so to be on the safe side, I chose to hide my salary from her. Fortunately for me, I have been able to save a lot from my salary for the future because if it were for my wife, she wouldn’t mind if I spend my last kobo on a Dubai shopping spree.”